


Beneath the Prairie Sky

by jncar



Category: Once Upon a Time (TV)
Genre: Alternate Universe - Modern Setting, Captain Duckling, F/M, Teen Romance, demolition derby, rodeo
Language: English
Status: In-Progress
Published: 2014-08-28
Updated: 2015-02-10
Packaged: 2018-02-15 03:59:36
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 5
Words: 32,242
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/2214951
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/jncar/pseuds/jncar
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>18 year old Emma Nolan, the college-bound Queen of the annual Storybrooke, Colorado Outlaw Rodeo, has her whole life planned out. Until she meets local demolition derby champ Killian Jones and he turns her world upside down.</p>
            </blockquote>





	1. Chapter 1

**Author's Note:**

> Though I've watched both rodeos and demolition derbies, I've never been behind-the-scenes of either and I'm not 100% familiar with either sport. I'm bound to get some details wrong. Please forgive me.

As a kid, Emma Nolan always believed that the sky over Storybrooke, Colorado must the purest, brightest, most beautiful blue sky anyone would ever see in the whole wide world. She loved to sit on the fence around the horse pasture behind her house, and when she wasn't watching the horses, she'd stare up at that Colorado prairie sky and dream.

She thought she'd never see anything that compared to that sky.

Until, at age eighteen, one Saturday in January a pair of blue eyes took her breath away.

She'd been in the public library for a few hours working at one of the study tables when he slid into the easy chair against the wall right across from her. No one had walked by in close to an hour so the movement instantly caught her eye. As soon as her gaze lifted from her laptop, their eyes locked, and that vivid, intense blue held her transfixed. 

It took her a few moments to realize she was staring, and she blinked a few times to break the spell. By then he was smiling—which only heightened the effect of those eyes. His dark, black-brown hair was just a bit shaggy, draping over his ears and curving up ever so slightly at the nape of his neck, but not long enough yet to be called _long_ , and his short scruffy beard looked slightly reddish in the stark winter sunlight slanting through a nearby window. He wore a dark blue tee-shirt and jeans over a lean but muscular form, and looked like he couldn't be more than a few years older than her.

_Damn, he's hot._ A smile rose unbidden to her lips before she managed to curtail it. Clearly she'd been trapped in this library for far too long.

His smile grew into a smirk, as if he could read her mind, and then he winked at her.

A little full of himself, wasn't he?

Before she could get properly outraged, he cracked open the well-worn paperback novel he held and looked down to read.

Emma took a few deep breaths to clear her mind and turned back to her laptop on the table in front of her. There would be plenty of hot boys to gawk at in college next year when she had time to worry about things like that. But she'd never make it to college in the first place unless she finished these darn college applications. She was determined to have them completed and submitted by the beginning of the week. She'd come to the library to escape the noise of her rowdy 12 year old brother, Neal, and his gang of friends.

When her mother had let any and all friends come hang out whenever they wanted during Emma's childhood, Emma had loved it. But now that her mom was doing the same thing with Neal's friends, Emma had decided that having an open-door policy like that might not be the best thing. Those boys were _loud_.

Emma continued to work her way steadily through all her applications. She was applying to four different schools in Colorado, but Colorado State in Fort Collins was her top choice. She saved that application for last—the cherry on top of her labors for the day. 

Every few minutes she felt a tingle on the back of her neck, and felt in her gut that the hot guy must be watching her, but every time she raised her eyes he was bent over his book, reading. There was something familiar about him, but she couldn't quite place it.

_Why doesn't he just check it out and read at home so I can work in peace?_

Even with the distraction she managed to finish all of her applications. With a satisfied smile she closed up her laptop and began packing up her things. Her eyes flicked toward the guy one more time as she lifted her laptop into her bag, and this time he was definitely watching her.

Nice. She smiled again. It didn't matter that she'd probably never see the guy again—it still felt good to have a hot guy check her out.

She pulled on her coat, slung her bag over her shoulder, and headed out of the study area. She passed through the main lobby and out the front doors. Just before she stepped off the walkway into the parking lot, she heard a voice calling out from behind her.

"You're a barrel rider, right?"

It was mister tall dark and hot. He'd followed her.

"Excuse me?" she said, a little taken aback.

"I've been trying to figure out where I recognize you from," he said. "And I just got it. You're a barrel rider. Junior Regional Champion."

Emma wasn't sure whether to feel flattered or anxious by his obvious ploy for attention. But those eyes of his drew her in—and that smile. _He probably knows exactly what effect he has on girls._

Still, she couldn't help but smile. "Yeah. I am."

He nodded and tucked his thumbs into his belt loops, trying to look oh so cool and casual. "Thought so. I'm a fan. I make it to most of the competitions in the region. I've seen you ride a bunch of times. You go to West High, don't you?"

"I do," she admitted, and her eyes narrowed as the sensation of recognition kicked in again. "Did you go to West?"

"Yep." He took a couple of ambling steps closer, the afternoon sun bringing out the glint of red in his beard. "Graduated almost three years ago. You're a senior, right? I was a senior when you were a freshman."

Emma nodded, her eyes unconsciously tracing the well-defined curve of his biceps. If he had a coat, he'd forgotten it inside. In spite of the sun the temperature was below freezing, and goose bumps were standing up on his arms in the cold. How bad had he wanted to talk to her?

She swallowed hard. "Yeah. I thought you looked a little familiar," she admitted, realizing the moment she said it that she was also admitting to checking him out. Oh well. If he was going to flirt, she might as well flirt back. "What's your name?"

"Killian Jones," he replied, flashing that heart-melting smile again. He shifted his hands to his pockets. He must have been feeling the cold.

Emma narrowed her eyes at him a moment, and in a flash the name and the face fell into place in her mind. _Killian Jones—a devil with the face of an angel,_ she remembered her 3-years-older cousin, Cindy, warning her one day when she'd caught Emma staring at him across the cafeteria. After the stories Cindy wove, Emma had stopped staring and steered clear. He hadn't had the beard, then; that's why she hadn't recognized him right away.

Killian had been a senior her freshman year all right—a senior for the second time. He'd missed most of his first attempt at a senior year on account of being locked up in juvie. No one seemed to know for sure what he'd been locked up for. Rumors varied from car theft to assault to attempted murder. In any case, this wasn't a nice guy.

Emma's heart started to race even as Killian prompted, "And you're…"

"Emma," she said reflexively. "Emma N—"

"Nolan," he finished with her. "Yeah. I think just about everybody in town knows that name, what with your Dad owning the Ford dealership and all."

Great. A potential car thief now knew exactly who she was. "Yep. That's me." She rocked on her heels, wondering how to make her escape.

Nolan Ford was a town institution. It had been passed down from her great-grandfather to her grandfather, and from him to her dad just a few years ago when Pops retired to Arizona. And her dad intended to pass it down to her—whether she wanted it or not. The last thing she needed was to get mixed up with Killian Jones so he could find an easy target for his thievery.

He must have seen the change in her face, because his lips got narrow and he nodded slowly. "I take it my reputation has preceded me?"

No harm in admitting the truth, now. Emma nodded. "You could say so."

He grimaced. "Look—if you want me to go away and leave you alone, I will. Just know that not all gossip is true, and most rumors are full of crap. Trust your gut—not what people say when they're bored."

Right then, Emma's gut didn't know quite what to think. He didn't seem menacing, and criminals don't usually hang out at libraries on Saturday afternoons. Plus, he looked pretty damn sincere when he was defending himself. That was enough to pique her interest. "So… you didn't spend most of a year in juvie?"

Killian sighed and ran a hand through his hair. He was beginning to shiver. "That part's true. But I'm not a drug dealer, or a murderer, or an attempted murderer, or a car thief, or a gang member, or whatever else it is people are saying about me these days. I made a stupid mistake when I was seventeen, and I paid for it. I haven't been in trouble with the law since." His eyes grew more intense as he spoke, and his cheeks flushed. Emma couldn't tell if it was from the cold or from high emotions, but she knew she was starting to feel guilty for bringing all this up. If Cindy was here right now Emma would kick her in the shins.

"I have a job," Killian continued, "I pay my rent, I stay out of trouble, and I just try to enjoy life. That's it." He looked down at the ground and shook his head. "I'm sorry. I shouldn't have gone off on you like that. Small towns, y'know? Everybody's up in everybody else's business." He shrugged. "But I've got no place else to go, so I keep running into this old crap." He sighed. "Sorry again. I shouldn't have bothered you. Have a good afternoon." He turned to head back inside.

Emma felt a stirring of regret in her gut—like she'd just passed up an opportunity for something special. It was stupid, but she couldn't help it. "Killian, wait!" She hustled after him.

He stopped just outside the doors and turned to meet her gaze with a cocked eyebrow.

She took a deep breath. "I know exactly what you mean about small towns. Everybody thinks they know you, even if they don't. And we all rush to judgment. My mom's always reminding me not to judge people too quickly, because they all have hidden depths. I guess I just wasn't listening to her. I'm sorry I ruined your afternoon. You were just being friendly."

Killian's answering smile was softer and more cautious than his earlier cocky grins. "Thank you, Emma Nolan. I think you just displayed some of your hidden depths."

Emma's heart fluttered a little at the look in his eyes. This one was trouble—criminal or not. But Emma had been a good girl her whole life, and she was about to graduate high school. Maybe it was time to get in a little trouble. "Thank you, Killian Jones. I appreciate that."

"Look," he said, turning back to face her, "I've gotta confess—I came out after you to ask if I could buy you a coffee sometime. But then I realized you're still in high school, and I don't want to be one of those pervs who dates high school girls, on top of everything else people say about me. But, uh, you're something special, Emma Nolan." 

Emma's gut stirred with excitement at the thought of going out with this mysterious and sexy guy. As he eyed her thoughtfully his tongue briefly darted out to lick his lips in a way that sent sparks shooting through her, and she tried to work up the courage to ask him if he'd be willing to make an exception to the "not dating high school girls" rule in her case.

Before she could say anything, he spoke. "Can I see your phone for a minute?" he asked.

Emma's mind went blank for a moment before she realized what he wanted to do. Then she smiled, the butterflies in her gut flapping wildly. "Sure," she said.

She pulled her phone out of her coat pocket and handed it over. He clicked over to her address book and quickly typed in his cell number. He handed her phone back to her, once more wearing that self-assured smile that caught her eye in the first place. "Here's my number. If you decide you wouldn't mind getting coffee with the weirdo from the library who might be pervy enough to date a high school girl after all, text me. If you decide not to, just delete my number. No harm no foul, right?"

Emma grinned like a fool, and her hands felt warm and tingly in spite of the cold. "Okay."

"Okay," he replied. "See you later, Emma Nolan."

"See you later, Killian Jones," she replied, feeling more grown up and free than she had in ages.

He shot her one more cocky wink, and strode back into the library.

Emma hopped into her yellow VW bug and drove home. After popping inside to drop her bag in her room she dodged Neal and his yelling friends in the kitchen, grabbed two apples, and headed out to the stable. She made her way right to Leroy's stall. He nickered in welcome and walked up to the gate to let her pet his nose.

"Here you go, buddy," she said, holding out one of the apples. He used his lips to pull the shiny red fruit into his mouth and started crunching happily.

Emma smiled and patted his cheek. "I met a cute boy, today, Leroy. Don't know what I'm going to do about it, but it was pretty fun."

~ ~ ~

The next day Emma shared the story of her library encounter with her best friend, Ruby. Just as she expected, Ruby squealed in delight and spent the next two hours analyzing every moment of Emma's interaction with Killian in minute detail.

But Ruby had one bottom line. "You're gonna text him, right?"

Emma shook her head. She wasn't the kind of girl who went out with strange men with criminal pasts. But she was also pretty tired of being the town goody-goody. "I don't know," she admitted.

"Well, you'd better make up your mind fast, or, if he's really as hot as you say, someone else will take him off the market," Ruby stated with finality.

Emma's priority that week was to get her college applications finalized and submitted. But once that important task was done she did pull out her phone once in awhile to stare at Killian's number. The problem was she had no idea what to text to him. She really knew next to nothing about him.

Soon enough the busy tasks of her life took precedence over her random romantic encounter. As class vice-president and valedictorian she had a prom to help plan and a graduation speech to prep for, not to mention wrapping up her final classes (she was _not_ going to slack off just because she'd already submitted her college apps). Once the weather got a little warmer she also had to kick up her training schedule with Leroy for the coming rodeo season. She was planning on making her debut in adult competition that summer, and she had to be ready.

Eventually she stopped staring at Killian's name in her address book and instead skimmed right past it as if it wasn't there at all.

She pushed her thoughts of her brief flirtation with Killian Jones to the back of her mind, and didn't think of him again.

At long last the Saturday of graduation arrived. That afternoon, while still basking in the glow of the ceremony and her successfully delivered speech, Emma agreed to Ruby's insistent demand that they attend the wildest no-adults-present graduation party in town.

After all, for months she'd been meaning to let go of the goody-goody persona, let her hair down, and have a little real fun. What could possibly go wrong?

 

Tbc


	2. Chapter 2

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Much thanks to the wonderful Tumblr friends mrsracerx for her insight into the world of demolition derby, and to maceyaudenstarr for her details on a certain controlled substance. I said 4 chapters originally. I lied. It'll be 5.

Emma held Ruby's hair back from her face as Ruby crouched, retching behind a bush at the side of the dark road. Emma marveled at the way the moonlight reflected off of the silky dark strands until the bright flash of headlights pierced her reverie and she lifted her head to blink narrowed eyes at the oncoming vehicle.

She felt a little floaty, as if she was watching the truck coming toward her body from back in the field she stood beside instead of with her own eyes.

But she had to be watching with her own eyes because the light was starting to hurt. She raised a hand to shield her view as the truck pulled to a stop. She wondered absently why they were stopping. And why was the driver getting out of the cab? It was certainly a nice night for a walk, but he didn't _have_ to walk. Not like her.

The silhouette of the man drew closer, cutting through the glare of the headlights, until he stopped a few feet away. Emma blinked until she could finally make him out. "Hey! I know you!" she giggled in delight at the unexpected flash of recognition. "I met you at the library!"

Killian Jones squinted at her with a puzzled look on his face. "Emma Nolan? Are you—are you all right? Do you need some help?"

As if in answer, Ruby started a fresh round of retching.

Emma reached down to pull her friend's hair up again. "I've got her hair. That's the best friend's job, right? To hold the hair out of the way of the vomit. And I got her out of the party so she'll be safe." She nodded, smiling at her own successes. "I'm doing pretty good, I think."

Killian raised an eyebrow. Wow. He was still really hot.

Ruby coughed and Emma gently patted her head. "There there, hon. It'll be okay."

"Um…" said Killian, "where are you ladies trying to go?"

"Away," said Emma with confidence, gesturing down the street. "We were at a crazy graduation party a ways round the bend," she pointed back toward the now-distant intersection, "and Ruby got pretty wasted." Emma shook her head. "I have read way too many stories on the internet about drunk girls getting raped at parties. I was _not_ gonna let that happen to my best friend. No way. So I took her, and we left."

"Uh huh," Killian nodded in understanding. He seemed like such an understanding person. "Why aren't you driving? Did you have a few, too?"

Emma shook her head emphatically. "No way. Sometimes my mom lets me finish her wine at dinner, and I had a beer once when Ruby snuck some out of Granny's fridge, but I've never been drunk. I've seen people get drunk, and it doesn't look like any fun at all." She scrunched her nose and pointed down at Ruby. "See? So I was going to be the designated driver. But they had some pot brownies at the party. And I've never done pot, but people who do pot don't get sick and gross. They just seem really relaxed and have weird conversations. That seemed like it might be fun, and I thought it would wear off before it was time to leave, so I had one. And then Ruby got wasted _really fast_. Like, I had no idea you could get wasted that fast. But there was no way I was going to let my best friend pass out drunk and get raped, so we had to leave. And the key-master told me I was still too high to drive! Do you think I'm still too high to drive?"

Killian grinned at her. Emma wasn't sure what he was so happy about.

He nodded. "Uh, yeah. I think that key-master did you a pretty big favor."

"Really?" Huh. She'd been pretty sure she could still drive. But maybe Killian knew better. He looked like the kind of guy who'd done some pot. "Have you done pot before?"

He laughed and nodded again. "A few times. So—um—those don't look like very good shoes for walking."

Emma glanced down at her kitten-heel sandals. "They really aren't. But I got such a great deal on them."

"I'm sure you did." Killian stuffed his hands in his pockets and rocked on his heels. "Could I maybe give you a ride somewhere?"

Emma's jaw dropped. She'd never even considered the possibility of getting a ride. And then a ride just popped out of nowhere. It was like fate, or destiny, or an act of divine intervention. Who knew God and the universe were watching out for her like that? Or maybe they were watching out for Ruby? Either way, it was good news. "That would be wonderful. So wonderful. You are so nice. I never guessed you would be this nice."

He laughed again. "I have it in me from time to time. Come on. Let me help you."

He stepped forward to help raise Ruby from her squatting position on the ground. "Look Ruby," said Emma, "we've got a ride!"

Ruby groaned.

"I think that means thank you," Emma translated. Together they managed to get Ruby up onto the back bench of Killian's somewhat worn-looking crew cab truck where she promptly fell asleep. Then Emma clambered into the passenger seat beside Killian.

"Where to?" he asked.

"I don't know," Emma replied. "I used the GPS on my phone to get to the party, but when we left I thought I'd try navigating by the stars."

Killian laughed again. Apparently she was very funny when she was high. Interesting. 

"How did that go?" he asked. 

"Not too good," she admitted.

"Well, give me Ruby's address and I'll get you there."

"Oh, no," said Emma, aghast. "We can't take Ruby home like this! Her Granny will kill her!"

Killian tapped his steering wheel. "How about your address, then?"

Emma shook her head. "If my parents found out I got high, they would ground me for the rest of the summer. That's a long time."

"Well—maybe you could wait at McDonald's or something until your high wears off?" he suggested.

"Nooooo," she drawled. "I'm trying for Rodeo Queen this year. If anyone sees me like this my reputation will be ruined. I won't have a chance. I can't go anywhere public."

Killian sighed. "Well, it sounds like we only have one option, then. My place is a mile and a half down the road. I'll take you there until your high wears off, and then I'll bring you back to the party to pick up your car. How does that sound?"

Emma grinned. "You have the best ideas. You must be so smart. This is perfect."

"Yeah. I hope so," he said, but he didn't sound as certain as she did.

As they drove Emma found herself staring at the rearview mirror. She frowned. "There's a floating car with no lights on following us."

Killian glanced at the mirror and then, once again, laughed—a big hearty laugh that sounded warm and friendly, and she wished she knew what was so funny so that she could laugh along with him.

"Sorry, love," he said. "Just… that car isn't floating. I'm towing it. It's on a trailer hooked up to my truck."

Emma's mouth hung open, and then she started to laugh, too. "Wow. I'm really high, aren't I?"

"Yes, I definitely say you are. But at least it's a good high, right?"

Emma pushed her hair back from her face and grinned. "Yeah. I think it is, isn't it?"

A minute later they pulled up in front of an old, somewhat run-down one story house. It sat on a sprawling property that was clearly used for nothing but housing beat up old cars—at least six of them were visible around the house and the large detached garage in the glare of the headlights. Emma was puzzled. She pointed back at the car on the trailer. "Why do you need that car if you've got so many already?"

Killian grinned and shook his head. "I, uh, drive in demolition derbies. These are my derby cars."

Emma opened her eyes a little wider. "You crash into other cars for a crowd?"

He shrugged and tilted his head. "Yeah. I do."

Still feeling slightly baffled by that concept, Emma climbed out of the truck.

Together they helped a still mostly-asleep Ruby get out of the car and led her through the overgrown yard toward the front door.

"You'll have to excuse my roommates," said Killian as they stepped up onto the porch.

"Excuse them for what?"

"I'm sure they'll give you a reason," he replied, and then opened the door.

Just inside the door was a long, narrow kitchen/family room combo. Two guys sat in front of a big flat screen tv in the family room area. One of them called, "Hey, did you pick up the ca—" and stopped short when he caught sight of the three of them stepping inside. He jumped to his feet, clutching his can of beer in his hand and staring, open-mouthed. He looked about Killian's age and was athletic and pretty good looking—just a tad baby-faced.

The other guy turned his head to look, and gawked open-mouthed. This one was tubby around the middle and sported an unruly mop of curly brown hair. "What the what?" he exclaimed.

"I had to stop on the way home and help a few friends escape an unpleasant party," said Killian, leading Emma and Ruby toward the thrift store sofa. A few crumbs of some unknown food bounced on the cushions as Ruby flopped down and made herself comfortable.

"I think she'll be all right there for a few hours while you both sober up," said Killian.

Emma nodded and started glancing around to take in her surroundings. It wasn't filthy, but it wasn't what she'd call _clean_ either. Empty cans of beer, energy drinks and soda sat abandoned here and there on the various tables and countertops, mingled with assorted auto parts, a compound bow and a scattering of arrows. Huh.

Raising her eyes, Emma noticed a cardboard cutout figure of Johnny Depp as Jack Sparrow in one corner, and a dirty-looking pirate flag hanging on the wall across from the door. "Someone here must really like pirates."

Killian grinned and shrugged. "It's kind of my thing."

Weird.

The tubby roommate was on his feet now, too, staring back and forth between her and Ruby. Emma wasn't sure she liked the look of him. The cute roommate stepped forward. "Aren't you going to introduce us?" he asked.

"Yeah, yeah, of course," said Killian. He pointed at cute roommate, "Emma, this is my cousin, Rob Locksley." Cute roommate smiled and nodded. Killian pointed at tubby roommate. "And this is Billy Smee."

"Hey," said Billy with a giddy smile and waved at her.

"Guys, this is Emma and Ruby," Killian finished.

Billy pointed at Ruby. "Is she gonna throw up? Because I don't think my mom will let us borrow her carpet cleaner again."

Emma shook her head. "I don't think she has anything left to throw up."

"Oh," Billy replied with a wide-eyed expression.

"So why exactly did you need to escape that party, Emma?" Rob asked, putting on a flashing grin.

His teeth shone brightly, even in the dimly lit room. She tilted her head, staring at them. "Your teeth are so white and shiny."

Killian stepped forward, "Uh, Ruby here had a little trouble holding her liquor, and Emma couldn't drive her home because she decided to try her very first pot brownie tonight."

"It was really good," commented Emma. "It tasted just like a regular brownie. But it definitely wasn't a regular brownie."

Billy giggled and nodded. "Next time you want one you have to get it at The Magic Leaf over on 5th. Their baked goods are the best."

"Thanks for the tip," said Emma. "You guys are so nice. You're all so nice." Emma turned to Killian and swatted him playfully on the chest. "If I'd known you were so nice I would've texted you after you hit on me at the library."

Killian coughed uncomfortably, but the pendants on a chain around his neck drew Emma's eyes. They looked like a pair of military dog tags hanging next to a shiny silver skull and crossbones. She grabbed them and tugged on him to get a better look. "You really do have a thing for pirates, don't you?"

"Uh, yeah." 

She glanced up to notice how close his face was to her now. Wow. He really was hot. Super hot. And those eyes…

"Your eyes look like the sky," she said dreamily.

Though she heard snickering laughter from somewhere beside her, she couldn't tear her gaze away from those eyes.

She felt Killian's hands closing around hers, gently pulling her fingers loose from his pendants. "Hey, why don't we get you something to drink?"

That sounded really good. She hadn't realized she was thirsty, but she was really really thirsty. "Sure," she replied.

Killian took her by the elbow and led her into the kitchen. She liked the way his hand felt on her arm—firm and strong and warm. It made her feel all tingly inside.

He opened the fridge. "This is what we've got," he gestured inside.

Emma frowned. "You guys don't eat very well, do you?" But then she perked up when she caught sight of a familiar bottle. "Diet Coke! I love Diet Coke. I practically live off the stuff."

"It's all yours," replied Killian, handing her the bottle.

She cracked off the lid and started taking sips while Killian grabbed a trash can and started darting around the kitchen tossing empty cans and other trash into it. Rob joined in, gathering up as many of the empty cans from the family room as he could carry. Emma smiled. It was so cute watching them bustle around in an attempt to impress her. She wondered how long the cans would have sat there if she hadn't come over.

Billy, on the other hand, settled back into his chair and unpaused the show they'd been watching. 

"Baby raccoons!" Emma exclaimed as the shot filled the screen.

"Cute little fuckers, aren't they?" said Billy.

Killian promptly walked over and smacked the back of Billy's head. "Watch your language around the ladies, dude."

Billy rubbed the back of his head and glared at Killian.

"What are you watching?" Emma asked.

"Episode of Nature," replied Rob sheepishly.

"I love Nature. Animals are awesome." Emma strode over to the family room and sank onto the couch, settling Ruby's feet in her lap.

She grinned at the antics of the raccoons on the screen, but felt a rumbling in her stomach. She looked up at Killian. "Do you have any ice cream?"

One big bowl of chocolate ice cream and most of an episode of Nature later Emma started to feel more like herself again. As the episode wound down Billy's not-so-subtle leering at her legs clued her into the fact that she hadn't been sitting in a very ladylike posture considering the short sundress she was wearing, and she'd tugged on her skirt and crossed her legs.

Now, as Billy and Rob argued about what to watch next (Billy wanted to watch the latest SyFy horror movie, Rob wanted to watch Ninja Warrior), Emma felt Killian's gaze on her. She looked over to see him smiling mischievously at her from a chair right across the room.

"What?" she asked, smiling back. "What is it?'

He reached up to his face and tapped a spot just below his lip (drawing attention to what a nice mouth he had) and said, "You've got a little ice cream right here."

As if this night couldn't get any more embarrassing. Emma looked down and licked a finger to scrub away the spot. "Did I get it?" She flicked her gaze back up toward him.

He nodded. "Yeah. You got it."

Emma sighed. "Thanks. Tonight has not exactly been stellar for me."

"I've enjoyed it," he replied.

Emma felt a new surge of tingles in her gut.

"I've enjoyed it, too," said Billy.

Rob back-hand swatted Billy's arm. "Shut up, man."

Emma rolled her eyes and looked back at Killian. "Do you think I'm ready to drive, yet?"

"Soon. I'd give it another forty-five minutes or so, just to be safe."

She took a deep breath. If she was ever going to get to know this man a little better, now was her chance. "Do you want to show me your cars? Maybe tell me a little more about this smash and crash thing you like to do?"

His grin grew even wider. "Sure. Come on."

He stood up and Emma followed, carefully scooting out from under the still-sleeping Ruby's feet.

As they neared the door she paused. She'd taken Ruby out of the party to protect her. Was she any safer here? She rested a hand on Killian's arm. "Hey, will she be okay with those two?"

Killian gave her a tight smile and nodded, then turned back to his roommates. "Hey, Billy, if you lay so much as a finger on that girl, I swear to God I'll kick your ass so hard it'll take you week to turn it right side out again."

Billy simply snorted in reply, and Rob chuckled. "Don't worry. If he tries anything I'll kick his ass for you—spare you the trouble."

"Real nice, guys," said Billy shaking his head. "Real nice."

Emma smiled. She could imagine Neal engaging in these kinds of brotherly antics with his friends in another ten year's time.

Killian opened the door for her, and as she walked out she heard Billy muttering, "He always gets the best girls. It's no fair."

"You'd get girls like that, too, if you looked like him," replied Rob. "Stop bitching and start lifting weights once in awhile."

She giggled a little. Killian stepped out after her and pulled the door closed behind them. "Like I said—excuse my roommates."

Emma grinned. "It's okay. I like them. I'm a rodeo girl, remember? I'm around cowboys all summer every summer. Trust me—your roommates can't possibly get any worse than that."

Killian scratched his ear nervously and looked down as they walked over the cracked driveway to the detached garage. "Doesn't your Dad go to all those rodeos with you? I would have thought he'd keep you away from all the cowboys."

Emma clasped her hands behind her back to stop from fidgeting and the tingles in her belly surged again. "Killian Jones—have you been checking up on me?"

He grinned. "I'm just a rodeo fan. I notice things. That's all."

"Mmm-hmm." Emma wasn't quite sure what to think. 

Killian punched in the garage code and sighed. "Don't look so nervous. I'm not a stalker or anything." The glow of light from the garage door opener bathed his face as the door rose. "I confess—I did look up your stats after I met you a few months ago. But I really did just notice the thing with your dad—it's hard to miss those "Nolan Ford" shirts he wears everywhere, or the big "Nolan Ford" splashed across the outside of your horse trailer."

Emma folded her arms across her chest, feeling a tad defensive. But he did have a point—the constant advertising did get a little old. She couldn't wait until she got to Fort Collins for school in the fall. Almost no one there would know anything about "Nolan Ford." She'd just be herself—not her dad's little girl. "He can get a little in your face with the self promotion."

Killian shrugged. "Can't blame the man. He's got to make a living, same as the rest of us."

"What kind of work do you do?" Emma asked, suddenly curious. As much as he seemed to know about her, she still knew next to nothing about him.

"I'm a car man, through and through. Rob's dad, Pete, is my uncle. He owns Locksley's garage down on Spring Road. Rob and I both work there. You're not the only one who knows a few things about being part of a family business, love." He grinned and winked.

She licked her lips. The way the endearment rolled off his tongue was way too slick. Like he'd used it hundreds of times with dozens of other girls. He probably had. But that didn't change the fact that it stirred up those tingles again. She swallowed hard and forced herself to focus on his other words. "Yeah. I've seen that place. Looks like it gets pretty good business."

"We keep busy," he agreed, nodding. He strode into the garage and flipped on another light.

He gestured around the spacious garage filled with equipment. "This is where we pound our cars into shape."

He pointed out various tools, explaining their function. "Got most of it used from my uncle for cheap. He used to be a derby man, back in the late eighties and nineties. He's the one who got me into the sport."

"What about Rob?" she asked. "Does he ride in derbies, too, or did the crazy skip a generation in his case?"

Killian laughed, toying restlessly with a screwdriver as he leaned against a work table. "Rob's driven a few derbies, but he's more of a bump and run guy."

"A what?" Emma raised her eyebrows.

Killian shook his head slowly. "Emma Nolan—you've never been to a demolition derby, have you?"

"No," she confessed.

He shook his head again, putting on an expression of mock disbelief. "I cannot believe it. Nearly every county fair along the Rockies that has a rodeo has either a derby or a bump and run to go with it. Hell—half the city rodeos have affiliated derbies or races, too! And yet, Miss Junior Regional Champion barrel racer, you've never been to either." He clicked his tongue chidingly and shook his head again.

She put her hands on her hips and glared at him. "I was always a little busy trying to win my own sport. And when I wasn't competing I was tending my horse or helping my dad wrangle my kid brother—who happens to be insane and needs constant supervision, thank you very much. So forgive me if I never got a chance to go see a gang of nut-jobs crash into each other's cars."

His eyes narrowed and his lips shaped into a tight smile as he held her gaze, appraising her. "You don't let loose much, do you?"

She rolled her eyes. "I thought I'd give it try tonight, and look how well it's gone."

He spread his hands. "It doesn't seem so bad to me. You had a good high with your first dose of pot, rescued your friend from the unscrupulous clutches of intoxicated teenagers, and made some charming new friends."

Emma couldn't help but smile. "Nice vocabulary."

He winked. "I read a lot. Now—your night of adventure is going to take a more educational turn. I'm about to teach you all about the sport of demolition derby. Come on."

He gestured to the cars parked helter skelter in the yard. Emma turned and felt his hand on the small of her back as he led her toward the odd assortment of vehicles. The tingles swelled up again. 

Damn. If she ever felt like shedding her good girl persona for a little while to have a fling with a troublemaker, this was the perfect opportunity. Wasn't that was college was all about? Trying new things, meeting new people, exploring new aspects of yourself?

Maybe she could let that exploration start right here right now. Emma mulled over that thought while Killian talked.

He pointed to the cars. "So all those station wagons are mine. Tough old brutes. Really sound, heavy frames. I'm a station wagon man almost exclusively. You need a tough car to survive a derby. See—you run a heat and the last two or three cars standing make it into the feature match. You only have a little while in between your heat and the feature to pound your car back into shape, so you need something durable and reliable. Station wagons do it for me." 

He gestured to a scattering of other cars. "Now those are Rob's. See, a bump and run is like a combo derby and stock car race. The first car to finish all the laps is the winner, but in order to win you don't just drive fast, you also want to knock your opponents out of the way and either drive them off the track or disable them. So Rob keeps experimenting with different makes and models to find that perfect balance of speed, maneuverability, and durability."

"Why does he prefer bump and runs to derbies?" asked Emma, genuinely curious to learn more about how these strange guys thought. She'd never known anyone like them.

"Rob likes the speed, and the thrill of the race," replied Killian, a wicked gleam in his eyes. "Me, I just like to smash things."

Emma laughed at his devilish grin, and he seemed delighted by her response.

He spent the next little while explaining all the modifications they had to make to their cars to get them ready to compete. As she heard him talking about all the little details that mattered so much in his sport, she started, for the first time, to see a reflection of herself—a sense of kinship. She spent just as much time obsessing over Leroy—his health, his diet, their gear, their training regimens, as Killian seemed to spend on his cars.

In that way, at least, they were two of a kind.

After leading her around one of his cars to point out all the work he'd been doing, he rested his hands on the hood and got a distant look in his eyes. "There's just nothing like it, you know? I get out into that arena and my heart starts to pound. All I can hear is the rev of engines and sound of metal on metal. I can't hear the crowds or the announcers or anything—it's just me and my car against the world. Like I'm in my own little bubble of reality. I'm terrified—you have to be terrified. But at the same time the adrenaline surge fills my whole body—makes me feel invincible. Untouchable. Like nothing on earth can hurt me. And for about five amazing minutes, it's true. I'm unstoppable. I can push through straight through the fear and nothing can take me down. That's why I don't drink much and I've only done pot a few times. It just doesn't come close to that derby-high." He let out a slow breath, and his smile took on a slightly sheepish cast.

Emma watched him, transfixed. Whenever her dad talked about his old rodeo days—back when he did bronc riding and calf roping—he talked about skill and precision and the sweet taste of victory. But that wasn't why Emma competed. She liked winning, sure. Who didn't? But for her the real draw had always been that feeling of being completely caught up in the moment—floating on the heady combination of anxiety and adrenaline, relying on muscle memory to carry her through the run, with her heart pounding out of her chest. She lived for those moments—sheer terror combined with pure freedom.

"I know exactly what you mean," she said. "I feel it every time I wait in the chute for my turn to race. And for about twenty seconds I'm in a whole other world. Just me and my baby Leroy."

Killian met her eyes again and nodded. "And that's why I'm a fan of the rodeo. That and it's pretty damn convenient entertainment when I'm already in town for the derby." He gave her a pointed look.

Emma laughed again. Somehow Killian made it easy to laugh. "You're never going to let up on that, are you?"

"Not until you make it to your first derby," he said, wagging a finger at her.

They slowly ambled back toward the garage. Emma could feel the weariness of the long day creeping back up on her. She'd have to get back to her car soon, or she'd be too tired to drive. Even so, she didn't feel ready to let this evening end. Not yet.

They perched on the edge of Killian's work table and Emma spent a few minutes telling Killian about Leroy—how she was there when he was born. How she helped train him from day one. How he was her pet and her friend and her partner.

"That was my number one thing when I was applying to schools," she said. "There had to be intercollegiate rodeo so that I'd have an excuse to bring Leroy with me. I just don't think I could live without him."

Killian's piercing blue eyes studied her face like he was trying to memorize it. God, those tingles just wouldn't calm down.

"So you're college-bound?" he said softly. "I should've guessed."

She nodded. "Headed to CSU in Fort Collins at the end of August."

He ran his tongue along his bottom teeth and then smiled. "I hear it's a good school."

"It is. My dad wants me to go into the business program to get myself ready to take over the dealership someday. But, uh, that wasn't my main draw to the school."

"Oh yeah?"

"Yeah." She took a deep breath. She'd never confessed this to anyone. Not her parents. Not even Ruby. But for some reason she felt safe telling Killian. "They have an amazing biomedical engineering program at CSU. That's what I really want to do."

Killian let out a slow whistle. "Wow. Sounds like you really must have the brains to match your beauty."

Emma looked down at her hands, feeling herself grow warmer at the sound of his compliment. "I just want to do work that matters. That will make a difference for people. I want to help design technology that will make people's lives better. But I don't want to spend forever going to medical school. This program can get me into great research and development with just a bachelors or maybe a masters. It's perfect."

Killian nodded slowly. "I'm sure you'll be brilliant at it. I can tell just by the way your eyes light up when you talk about it."

Emma gripped the edge of the table to stop her hands from shaking. She'd just confessed her deepest secret—that she didn't want to go into the family business. And he thought she'd be brilliant. She felt like she was floating. "Thanks," she said softly.

Killian's answering smile was gentle, his eyes filled with a glow of feeling that made her heart leap. "I must say, though—Storybrooke will miss you, Emma Nolan."

Emma's breath caught in her throat for a moment, and though she'd come down from her high she still felt herself sinking into the clear depths of his eyes.

Trying to clear her head, she spoke. "Thank you. For helping us tonight. I really needed to get Ruby out of there, and I couldn't have done it without you."

The sincerity in his eyes faded as he raised his mask of cocky flirtation again, grinning at her. "Well—perhaps some gratitude is in order," he teased, tapping his lips suggestively.

Emma rolled her eyes and let out a short laugh. Killian's smile grew wider and he laughed in return, confirming that he'd just been messing with her, as she suspected.

But a bold new thought entered her mind. _Why not? Why shouldn't I kiss him?_ Hadn't she gone out tonight with the intention of letting herself get into a little trouble for once? And God, those lips of his looked nice.

Emma took a deep breath, trying to calm her racing heart, and met his warm gaze again.

_Now or never, Emma. Just go for it._

She reached one hand up to grab his pendants again and felt the old familiar intoxicating rush of fear and adrenaline. No turning back now

With a swift smooth tug she pulled him in for a kiss.

He responded quickly and eagerly, his fingers tangling in her hair, drawing her closer.

His beard scratched at her cheeks and upper lip, but his lips were unbelievable soft. His warm breath danced on her skin and her whole body was on fire. She clung to his necklace with one hand and tugged at his hair with her other just to stay upright—she felt as if her legs could give out underneath her at any moment.

She felt herself growing faint and pulled back a fraction to take a deep breath. His nose grazed against hers and she felt the urge to go in for more, even while a small part of her mind worried where it might lead.

"Wow," he whispered. "That was, uh…"

Emma swallowed hard, released her death grip on his pendants and rested her palm on his chest. "Yeah." She curved her lips into a smile. 

She'd had a grand total of four boyfriends in her life, and none of them stuck with her for longer than two months once they realized they'd always be third place to school and rodeo. But none of them had kissed anything like Killian Jones.

She felt more fire in her groin after thirty seconds of kissing Killian than she had after thirty minutes of making out with her last boyfriend.

Killian edged a little further back from her, and even those few inches of distance left her feeling cold and wanting.

His chest heaved. It seemed to take a moment to collect his thoughts before speaking again. "We should probably get you home, now."

A lump rose in Emma's throat. She felt as if someone had just thrown a big bucket of water over her. Had she done something wrong? She nodded without speaking and followed him wordlessly back up to the house.

Killian took a minute to unhitch the trailer from his truck while Emma gently roused Ruby.

"Ugh. My head hurts so bad," Ruby groaned. "Where are we? Why does it smell so weird?"

"It's okay, hon," said Emma. "We're at a friend's house. You're just hung over. We're taking you home now."

The ride back to the party house was a quiet one. Emma gave Killian a few simple directions, but they didn't speak otherwise. 

She had to have done something wrong, but she didn't know what. And she'd probably never find out. She'd probably never see him again after tonight.

As silly as it was, that thought was almost enough to bring tears to her eyes.

When they reached the party house, most of the guests had either left or passed out. There were only a few small clusters of people still carousing.

Killian helped her track down the key master, and after Killian vouched for her sobriety they reclaimed her keys.

Killian helped her get Ruby into her bug, and then Emma turned to face him one last time.

She took a deep breath. Time for goodbye. "Thanks again for everything you did tonight. I know we probably put you out a little. I really appreciate your help."

"You're welcome," he said softly. He shifted on his feet a little, as if trying to make up his mind what to do. And then a hard, determined glint entered his eyes and he met her gaze. "Emma—I regret kissing you tonight."

The pain that welled in her chest was sudden and sharp and completely irrational, but she couldn't stop it all the same.

He shook his head. "But I don't regret it because I didn't want to kiss you," Killian continued. "I did. And I do."

She drew in a sharp breath. What?

"The problem," he said, "was that I'd just helped you out of a tight spot and you were just coming down off of your first high, and I teased you into it. I feel like I took advantage of you, and you deserve better than that. But if you ever give me the chance to kiss you again under more optimal circumstances, well… that's an opportunity I wouldn’t pass up for the world. You are a remarkable woman, Emma Nolan."

Emma's mind went blank and her eyes were wide. She could only put together a single syllable in reply. "Oh."

His intense gaze still held her transfixed. "Do you still have my number in your phone?"

She managed a nod. "Yes."

His face cracked into a smile. "Use it. Please."

She swallowed and nodded again.

"Drive safe, Emma," he said, stepping back.

She nodded one more time and stammered some sort of reply, though she couldn't for the life of her remember what she said, and climbed into her car.

Somehow, even through the fog of sleep and lust, she got both herself and Ruby home safe, and tumbled into bed with her thoughts full of a pair of sky-blue eyes.

~ ~ ~

Emma leaned into the turn, kicking her heels against Leroy's firm sides as he launched around the final barrel. The dust flew beneath his feet as they tore down the straightaway to the finish line.

After crossing she slowed Leroy to a walk and circled back around to where her dad stood with the timer.

"Not bad." He nodded. "18.6. Best run of the day. But still not as good as I know you can be."

Emma sighed and pushed her ponytail back from her shoulder. "What did you honestly expect the day after graduation, dad? It's not like I got a lot of sleep last night."

"That's why training today is so important," her dad insisted, tugging his Nolan Ford baseball cap a little lower on his forehead. "You won't always be competing with good rest under ideal circumstances. You need to be able to push through it."

Emma rolled her eyes again. In theory she agreed with him, but in practice she just wanted to go back to bed. Maybe she could close her eyes and dream about that kiss from last night a little longer. There were moments when she still felt like it must have been a dream.

Her dad had her walk the course with Leroy for a few minutes before doing one last timed run, and then he let her call it a day.

When she finally made it to her room she flopped down on her bed and picked up her phone.

For the fourth time that day she scrolled through her contacts to Killian's number and stared at it.

Where was all her courage from last night? Why couldn't she just type a simple message?

_Come on, Emma. You can compete at breakneck speed on a 1,000 pound horse. Why can't you send a stupid text?_

She closed her eyes and took a deep breath, remembering his words. _"Use it. Please."_

Okay. No more scaredy-cat. Time to do it.

**This is Emma. Thanks again for your help last night.**

She pressed send.

And waited. And waited. 

With a sigh she rolled onto her belly and tried to settle in for a nap. Then she heard the message tone.

She quickly rolled over and checked her phone.

K: **And thank you for texting this time**

K: **Wasn't sure I'd actually hear from you**

Emma grinned.

E: **But now I know how nice you are, remember?**

K: **That's me. Such a nice guy. I'll prove it. How's Ruby?**

Emma settled back into her pillows for a nice long text chat—not yet wondering what it might lead to.

 

Tbc


	3. Chapter 3

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> This particular chapter was getting completely out of hand. I got 9,000 words in and realized I wasn't near done, so I resigned myself to splitting it and declaring that this is now projected to be a 6 chapter story *sigh*. I guess I'm writing a full New Adult romance novel here. But hey, at least I'm having fun doing it! And now I have a good start on the next chapter, so the next update should come quickly *fingers crossed*.

"Greg texted. He got strep throat. I can't spend the night. So you have to take me to the race." Neal folded his arms across his chest and looked up at Emma with a triumphant smile.

Emma narrowed her eyes. "He came down with strep throat since this morning?"

"Yep," Neal replied.

"That's BS," said Emma. Tonight was her first date with Killian and she was _not_ going to let Neal screw things up. "I'm calling Mom." She pulled out her phone, only feeling a slight twinge of guilt over interrupting her parents' rare night out.

"If you call Mom, I'll tell Dad what Ramon Ordenes told me!" Neal said, darting toward her.

Emma lowered her phone slowly and glared at him. Janelle Ordenes—the older sister of Neal's friend Ramon—happened to be the biggest busy-body gossip in town. "What did he tell you?"

"Ramon said his sister saw you getting stoned out of your mind at the graduation party last week." Neal nodded his head with a wicked grin on his face. "And if you don't take me to the race, I'm telling Dad."

Emma felt like throwing something. "Damn it Neal!"

He raised his eyebrow, giving her a "now what?" look.

Little turd. "I'm calling the friend I'm supposed to meet," she growled, and turned to stalk a few paces away, dialing Killian.

"Emma!" he answered brightly. "Are you on your way?"

She sighed. "Not yet. The friend my brother was supposed to spend the night with bailed, and my parents don't trust him home alone for more than an hour at a time so I’m stuck with him. I'm soooo sorry. I really want to come—"

"Hang on," Killian interrupted. God, this was the worst. Stupid Neal.

"What?" she said.

"How old is your brother, again?"

"Twelve."

"Bring him along," said Killian with a note of humor in his voice. "Twelve year old boys love a good bump and run. Trust me."

Ugh. And, in the process, prove to Neal that his blackmail ploy actually worked. But at least she'd get to see Killian again… "Are you sure? He's kind of annoying."

"Totally. I don't mind. Family comes first, right?"

Emma couldn't help but smile. "If you're really sure?"

"I am. Bring him. And hit the road soon—it's a long drive. I'll have tickets for all three of us."

She nibbled on her bottom lip, pondering the situation a moment longer. Well—Neal would probably be too caught up in the races to bug them too much. "Okay. Fine. I'll bring him." 

She winced at Neal's triumphant laughter from behind her.

"Great. See you soon."

She said good bye and hung up. "Go the bathroom now. It's a forty minute drive and I am not stopping for a potty break."

Fortunately Neal spent most of the drive playing games on his phone. It didn't take her long to find Killian waiting at the gate where they'd arranged to meet. Her heart leapt when she saw him again in the evening light. He still wore his pirate-style necklace, this time over a gray tee-shirt that fit tight enough to give her a good idea of the lean muscles beneath. His smile made her heart flip flop a few times, and he greeted Neal enthusiastically when she introduced him.

"My own cousin is in this race," Killian said to Neal, leaning over to draw close to Neal's eye-level. "Maybe after we can go visit him in the pits and he'll show you his car?"

"Awesome," said Neal with wide eyes, already peering at the dirt track beyond the fence.

"Thanks for being good about all this," Emma said softly as Killian led them toward their seats in the grandstand. "I know this isn't exactly what either of us had in mind."

"Don't worry about it," he replied. "It was either bring him along or have you miss out on your first ever derby action. I wasn't about to let that happen." He winked.

Emma grinned. This man was too good-looking for his own good, and he knew it. They settled down on the bench seating, with Emma sandwiched in between Killian and Neal. As they waited for the first heat to start Killian told them all about the sport, the cars, and the drivers he knew. Neal was in rapt attention. Emma normally only saw him so engrossed when he was playing video games.

At last the cars lined up for the first heat. "Which one is Rob?" Emma asked, craning her neck.

"He's not driving until the third heat. I'll point him out. Don't worry," said Killian.

The announcer over the loudspeaker introduced all the cars, then after a countdown a loud horn sounded and they were off.

Emma watched with wide eyes as the already battered-looking cars bounced and swerved around the rough track, and gasped the first time one side-swiped another.

Killian laughed. "Just you wait, love. That was nothing."

Sure enough a few moments later one car t-boned another, pushing it all the way off the track, and then executed a three point turn to get itself back in the race. Neal hollered with delight.

"Oh my God, this is insane!" said Emma over the noise of the crowd. 

"I know!" replied Killian, still grinning. "Isn't it great?"

Emma had to admit that there was a heart-pounding thrill to the spectacle. The noise of car engines revving, the crash of metal on metal, and the shouts of the crowd made her heart race in an exhilarating way. She could only imagine how much more intense the rush must be as a driver.

In between heats Killian bought her a large soda and got Neal a multi-colored shaved ice. "You didn't have to," said Emma. 

"No trouble. Let's keep the kid happy, and then we'll all be happy, right?" he replied with another wink.

At last Rob's heat came. He drove a stripped-down sedan painted green with a long white arrow down each side. Emma laughed. "What—does he think he's a super hero or something?"

"When he's driving he does," Killian replied.

She held his gaze. "And when you're driving, you're a pirate?"

"Absolutely I am," he replied. Then he leaned in to murmur in her ear, his shoulder brushing against hers with tantalizing pressure. "But when I'm not out wrecking havoc, this pirate can also be a gentleman."

He smiled at her slyly, and she smiled back, her heart doing another flip. Over the past week, as they'd been texting and talking on the phone, she'd discovered that flirtation was like a second nature to him. None of the other boys she'd spent time with had been like this, and she was finding that she liked it. No matter what else they were talking about or what else might be going on, it made her feel like she was always at the center of his attention.

Rob's race was particularly violent, and during a tense moment when Rob engaged in a little back and forth bashing with the car racing next to him she felt Killian take her hand. She smiled and sucked lightly on her bottom lip, threading her fingers through his and enjoying the tingles that shot through her body at his touch. She could almost forget that Neal was here, too. Almost.

Rob managed to win his heat, but in the final race he only came in fourth. Emma squeezed Killian's hand tight as they rose to their feet with the rest of the crowd to cheer Rob on, but his rival for third place managed to bump him out of position at the last second.

Emma's heart raced so fast that she felt dizzy when she realized it was all over for the night. She blinked at glanced around at the people filing out of the grandstand, the bright lights blaring down on the track, and stars overhead in the clear sky. "Wow. That went fast," she said.

Killian grinned and shook his head. "Not so fast. We've been here for more than two hours."

"Really?" It felt like no more than an hour.

He nodded. "Easy to get caught up in it all, isn't it?" 

She never would have guessed it, but it had been. 

Catching Neal's eyes, Killian said, "Let's head down to the pits!"

"Yeah!" Neal exclaimed, clearly revved up by the whole event.

Emma rolled her eyes, but had to admit Neal still seemed like a cute little kid when he got so excited about things.

Killian helped them navigate the crowds and got them past the gate into the drivers' pit area. Everywhere Emma looked people were banging on cars with sledgehammers or heavy metal pipes, or cars were being driven (or pushed) up onto trailers. Neal's wide eyes showed that Killian had been right about twelve year old boys loving this sort of thing.

After a few minutes the tracked down Rob to where he was loading his car onto a trailer behind a large truck with the words "Locksley's Auto Repair" on the side.

Rob finished parking his car on the trailer and then hopped down to say hello, with a large fifty-something man climbing out of the truck to join them.

"This is my uncle Pete," said Killian. "Pete, this is Emma and her little brother Neal."

Pete had a stocky build, a ruddy face and thinning hair, and one of the broadest grins Emma had ever seen. He took Emma's hand in a firm shake. "So you're the gal who's had Killian here checking his phone every five minutes all week? I can see why."

Emma smiled and glanced at Killian. Was he turning red? "Good to meet you," she said.

"Emma has a boyfriend, Emma has a boyfriend," Neal taunted.

She scowled at him. "Shut up, Neal."

"Hey, kid," said Rob, stepping forward to intervene, "do you want to sit in my car?"

That was more than enough to distract Neal. Rob and Pete led the boy over to the trailer and helped him up while Killian and Emma stepped around to the front of the truck for something a bit closer to privacy.

"I had a great time," Emma admitted. "It was a lot more fun than I was expecting."

"Glad to hear it," replied Killian, holding her gaze and tangling his fingers up with hers again.

"Now you can finally stop bugging me about the lack of derbies in my life." She grinned up at him.

He shook his head. "Oh, not yet. Not until you've seen an actual derby—not just a race. I'll finally let up after you come and see me drive in the crowning event of the Storybrooke Outlaw Rodeo Week next Sunday."

"Oh? I thought the crowning event was the rodeo finals. You know, where _I'll_ be competing on Saturday? The derby on Sunday is more of an after-show," she teased.

Killian placed his free hand over his heart, putting on an exaggerated expression of pain. "You really know how to wound a man, darling."

She laughed. "Don't worry. I'll come to your little derby to see what all the fuss is about."

"Good." He held her eyes, the grin not leaving his face for an instant. Thrills ran up and down her spine. Emma hadn't been this attracted to a guy _ever_. Maybe because the only guys she'd gone out with had just been boys—Killian was a man. One who probably had a hell of a lot more experience with _everythin_ g than she did.

For the first time since she started dating a few years ago, Emma felt more than a little intimidated. But she'd always enjoyed a challenge.

She struggled to contain her nerves and smiled. "And are you going to come watch _me_ ride, too? It seems only fair."

Killian took a small step even closer, his face drawing to within mere inches of hers. "Nothing could keep me away. I'll be sitting front and center every night to cheer you on." Fresh tingles ran up and down her spine when he leaned in and said in a low voice, "Besides, I love a woman who can ride fast and kick some ass."

"Sexy" wasn't a word Emma tossed around very often—not even when chatting about celebrities with Ruby. But right now Emma felt a heat rising in her center that screamed to her loud and clear that Killian Jones was undeniably sexy. She swallowed hard and moistened her dry lips with her tongue. "Killian Jones—I'm starting to get the feeling that you have a rather dirty mind."

He grinned lasciviously. "Not any moreso than any other guy. I just don't make a big pretense out of trying to hide it."

Emma giggled to hide her nerves. Oddly enough she liked him and was scared of him in equal measure. But if rodeo had taught her anything, it was that the only way to get over the fear of something was to face it head on and just _do it_. That thought made her giggle even more.

"What?" he asked, curiosity shining in his eyes.

She shook her head. "Nothing. Really."

He sighed. "You do have your secrets, don't you? But I mean to find them out. When can I see you again? And I don't mean over a barrier at the rodeo grounds."

"I don't know," she confessed. "The Rodeo Queen contest is day after tomorrow, and even if I lose—"

"You won't."

She ignored him. "Even if I lose, it'll still be a crazy busy week just as a rodeo competitor. But if I win it'll be even busier. And in between official events my dad will have me on a tight training schedule, and he'll expect me to go to bed early every night before the rodeo starts…" Emma trailed off. This was hardly the ideal week to start a new relationship. Was this a relationship? She hadn't even figured that much out, yet. And it looked like she wouldn't have time anytime soon.

"Is your dad always this much of a hard ass?" Killian asked, scratching his ear.

Emma frowned and pulled her hand back, folding her arms. She might complain about her dad, but no one else was allowed to. "He's hard on me because he believes in me. He sees my potential and wants me to live up to it. There's nothing wrong with that."

"Sorry. Didn't mean to offend," Killian replied. "My own dad's not around, but uh, Uncle Pete is the same way with me. I shouldn't get on your case for it."

"It's okay. I wish we had a little more time, too," she said.

He smiled apologetically. "Are you and your dad pretty close?"

"Yeah. We are," Emma admitted. "We butt heads sometimes, because we're both stubborn as mules. But I've always been a daddy's girl—ever since I was little. When I was a kid nothing made me happier than going riding with my dad, or training with my dad. He's gone to every single one of my competitions since I started, and right before my event he's always there to give me a kiss on the cheek for luck." Her smile grew. Her relationship with her dad wasn't as close as it used to be, but she knew she'd still cry if he missed one of her competitions. "I guess you could say he's my lucky charm."

Killian nodded slowly. "It's special—what you have with him. You're really lucky. I think it's pretty awesome."

"Thanks," she said. "I do too." She noticed a flash of something like pain in his eyes, and wondered where his own dad was. But now didn't seem like the right time to pry. Instead, she took a deep breath. "But I'm not just daddy's little girl anymore. I'm a grown woman, and I can set my own schedule. Whether I win the Queen contest or not, I'll the make the time sometime this week for us to get together. Okay?"

His smile blossomed again. "I'd like that."

"Good."

She squeezed his hand again before heading back to collect Neal for the drive home. On the surface this new thing with Killian seemed a little crazy—they came from different worlds. But for now that didn't seem to matter one bit. All she wanted was to see him again. The sooner the better.

~ ~ ~

Monday morning dawned bright and early when Emma rose to prepare for the Rodeo Queen contest. Three years ago she'd won Princess in the junior's category, and she'd been waiting for this chance to try again for Queen.

The horsemanship and interview portions took place all morning, and Emma nailed both. Leroy breezed through the proscribed patterns and movements without a single hesitation. And, thanks to her regular perusal of online news sites, she was able to discuss current events with a keen understanding. The rodeo and horse care questions were a piece of cake.

That evening came the modeling portions, which most closely resembled a traditional beauty pageant. She grinned from the stage when she caught sight of her parents, Ruby and Granny all sitting together. (Thankfully they'd had the presence of mind to leave Neal with friends). Her breath caught in her throat when she saw another familiar face—Killian sat near the back of the auditorium with his roommate Billy, grinning up at her in her formal dress.

She felt her high-heeled foot start to wobble under her, but regained her balance quickly and didn't let her smile falter for a second. Naturally he'd never mentioned he planned on coming. Just like him to surprise her.

He'd been nothing _but_ a surprise from the very start. As she settled into her place among the other contestants she let her eyes linger on him again. She was starting to think that he was the very best kind of surprise.

At the end of the evening she was announced as one of the final three, as she'd more than half expected, but her stomach still roiled with nervous jitters until the emcee announced the final standings and declared her this year's Queen of the Storybrooke Outlaw Rodeo.

The next little while passed in a blur of applause, congratulations and hugs from her family and friends. 

After most of the audience dispersed from the auditorium the rodeo organizers cornered her, the attendants, and their families to start talking about schedules and events for the week. After a few minutes Emma's focus drifted and she caught a glimpse of Killian leaning against the back wall of the auditorium near the exit with a bouquet of flowers in his hand. He smiled and wagged his eyebrows when their eyes met.

"Uh, sorry—I need to go to the ladies room," she said, interrupting the fussy little old man in a western shirt who'd been outlining the weekly schedule in minute detail. "Mom—you can get all the schedule stuff for me, right?"

Her mom blinked in surprise a few times, but then nodded. "Yes, of course I can."

"Great." Emma grinned and stole up the center isle between seats. When she reached Killian she said, "Come on," and continued on out into the foyer. 

He followed, smirking at her, and looking at her up and down in her sash and tiara. "Wow. You really are a beauty queen now, aren't you?"

Emma rolled her eyes. "The poise and modeling were only 30% of the score," she retorted. "The other 70% was horsemanship, rodeo and livestock knowledge and personal interview. Which I aced, thank you very much."

"I don't doubt it," he said softly, and she let herself smile. Sometimes she took herself a little too seriously. He held out the bouquet. "For you. Giving flowers to a pageant winner is a thing people do, right?"

"It is." She grinned, and felt her cheeks warm as she took the flowers. "Thank you."

"You're welcome."

In a moment of playfulness, she said, "What would you have done with the flowers if I lost?"

He rocked on his heels and smiled. "Well, I would've given them to you anyway. Because a fellow giving flowers to a woman he's interested in is also a thing."

She felt her heart leaping almost as high as it had while she waited for the results up on stage. "So you're interested in me?"

He leaned closer, a wicked twinkle in his eyes. "Very."

For a moment she lost all ability to speak, captivated by those tantalizing blue eyes.

Then Ruby burst out into the foyer. "Oh—uh—your parents sent me to find you. There's a few more things you need to take care of before you can head home."

The spell broken, Emma nodded and cleared her throat. "Yes. Of course. I'm coming." She turned back to Killian. "Uh—I'll text you. I'm not sure when I'll have time this week—I'll have to let you know."

He took a few steps back, still smiling. "I look forward to it." He glanced at Ruby. "Good to see you again, Ruby."

Ruby's eyebrows shot up. "Uh… yeah… good to see you, too."

Ruby grabbed Emma's arm and pulled her back into the auditorium. "Oh. My. God. That was Killian, wasn't it?"

Emma nodded, and held the flowers close to her chest. "Yeah. It was."

Ruby shook her head. "You have got to go for that one, Emma. That is a rare specimen of male beauty out there—you might never have this chance again."

Emma laughed, but she had to admit that she was starting to feel the same way.

~ ~ ~

Just as Emma predicted, Outlaw Rodeo Week was insanely busy. Between training for her upcoming adult rodeo debut and her official Rodeo Queen duties and appearances, she had barely enough time to eat and sleep, let alone date. 

She managed a few texts a day to Killian, but that was all. On Wednesday afternoon she thought she glimpsed him in the back of the crowd at her grocery store appearance, but that might have just been wishful thinking.

Thursday night came the pre-rodeo horse parade. She decked Leroy out in his finest, donned her fancy Queen-contest western wear, hat and sash, and joined her attendants in their place in the parade to smile and wave at the crowd.

Emma had always loved the parades that happened every rodeo week—the Thursday night horse parade, and the Saturday morning grand parade. She appeared in most of them since she started competing—both on horseback and on her dad's annual "Nolan Ford" sponsored float in the grand parade. But this year she would ride on the rodeo royalty float instead—for the first and last time.

Though she planned on returning to Storybrooke next summer, there was a bittersweet taste in her mouth as she walked Leroy through town and looked down at all the familiar faces staring up at her. Soon she'd be leaving all this behind for a new life in Fort Collins.

She'd miss it. She'd miss all of it. 

The thought was enough to bring tears to her eyes—until she saw Killian, Rob and Billy perched on a fence along the parade route. They all let loose with raucous teasing cat-calls as she and her attendants rode past, and Emma dropped her Rodeo Queen smile just long enough to stick her tongue out at them. But she didn't mind. Now, instead of crying, she was laughing.

She had to stick around for some ceremonial flag carrying at the opening ceremony of the rodeo that night, but then her duties for the day were done. Only the juniors competed on Thursday. Her preliminaries would come tomorrow, and finals on Saturday.

Once her dad helped her square away Leroy for the evening, she said, "I'm going to hang around here with some friends for a little while."

Her dad frowned a little, but nodded. "Okay. But be home by nine. You need a good night's sleep to be ready for all your work tomorrow."

Emma raised her eyebrows a little. "Nine? Seriously? It's already quarter to eight."

"Yes, nine," he said firmly. "Do you want to make it through to the finals, or not?" 

She sighed. He did tend to be right about these things. Not that it made it any more fun to listen to his orders. She shook her head. "Fine. I'll be home between nine and nine-thirty. Okay?"

His lips were tight, but he nodded his agreement. Emma kissed him on the cheek to wish him goodnight, and he perked up a little. "I'm only trying to help you win, sweetheart."

"I know, Daddy," she replied. And she really did. All he ever wanted was the best for her. "I'll see you in a few hours."

She wandered out of the horse loading area to the main parking lot and leaned against a lamppost while texting Killian to ask if he had any time to hang out for the next hour or so. He responded right away, letting her know that he was nearby. 

A few minutes later she climbed into his truck on the street next to the rodeo grounds. "Where to, beautiful?" he asked.

Emma shrugged. "Anywhere but here. I've done enough thinking and planning and coordinating for one week already. Just choose a place and go."

Killian nodded thoughtfully. "I think I know just the place."

A few minutes later they pulled up in front of a little old burger and shake joint called Anna's. Emma had been there many times before. Best milkshakes in Colorado. She grinned.

"You looked like you could use a little comfort food," Killian said with a smile.

They each got milkshakes—Emma got fudge brownie, Killian got peanut butter cup—and they split a chili-cheese fry.

They sat at one of the three old, weather beaten tables on the small porch area outside the dining room, and Emma scooped spoonfuls of her extra thick shake with relish, occasionally pausing to down a few fries.

"Looks like I chose the right place," Killian said with a gratified smile.

"It's been a hell of a long week and I haven't been eating regularly. This is beyond perfect," replied Emma. In between bites she filled him in on the highlights of her week so far.

"The best was definitely presiding of the kids' rodeo yesterday," she said. "All the little kids out doing the Calf Scrambles and Mutton Bustin. I did those when I was their age, just starting out in rodeo. And getting a chance to talk to them and inspire them and give them their prizes…" She smiled and sighed. "Well, it made me think all these years of hard work have been worth it, because now I get to share it all with a new generation."

Killian reached over to push one of her blonde curls back from her face, tucking it over her shoulder. "You're quite the role model now."

Emma took a deep breath. "It's a big responsibility, but I think I'm up to it."

"I have no doubt of it," he replied.

She got him talking about his last minute work on his cars for a while, and then laughed as he told a few funny stories about the antics he got up to with Rob and Billy. Before she knew it the clock on her phone read 9:15, thought it had seemed like barely any time at all.

She squeezed her lips together with regret and tapped the table.

"Something wrong?" he asked.

"I need to go home now," she admitted, looking up to see a flash of disappointment in his eyes.

But he didn't protest. He nodded and smiled wanly. "I understand. You've got a big day tomorrow. You need your rest."

He drove her back to where she'd parked her bug, near the horse loaded area. There was no free parking, so he let his truck idle in the road for just a moment.

"Thanks for the milkshake," she said. "I had a really good time."

"Me too," he replied.

"Okay, well…" She moved to open the door, but kept her face turned toward his.

Before she knew what was happening his hand was on her cheek and his lips were brushing against hers, slow and soft, his beard barely scratching against her skin.

The kiss ended just as suddenly as it began, and Emma was left breathless, feeling more than a little bereft. 

"See you tomorrow," Killian said softly.

Emma managed a nod. "Yeah. Bye." And she slid out of the truck, closing the door behind her.

She managed to make it to her car on wobbly legs and sank into the driver's seat. _Yeah. Bye?_ What kind of response was that? She was such an idiot.

Somehow she made it home in one piece, but the kiss danced in her mind right up to the moment she fell asleep.

~ ~ ~

During all her years of training for rodeo, Emma's dad had always told her to channel any stress or tension or nervous energy directly into her performance in the competition. That advice had never been more welcome than that Friday night.

That short, soft kiss—so full of promise—had rattled Emma to the core. That wasn't the kiss of a guy looking for hook-up or a short-term fling. That had been the real thing. And Emma hadn't yet made up her mind what she wanted to do about it.

There was no denying she liked him. A lot. But did she really want to start a new relationship when she was leaving for college in two months? On the other hand, if she didn't at least give this a try, how long would she regret it?

Emma was nothing _but_ tension and nervous energy when it came time for the rodeo to start. Killian had texted to let her know where he was sitting. Sure enough, it was front and center, just as he'd promised.

During the brief opening ceremony she once again rode out with her attendants to fill her role of queen, carrying a flag and waving to the crowd. She picked him out immediately as she rode past. There he sat in the second row back from the front, a wide cheeky grin on his face.

God, she wanted to kiss him again.

Maybe she needed to stop over-thinking things. Maybe she just needed to enjoy the ride. She'd only be eighteen once, after all.

About an hour later the time for the barrel racing finally arrived. Emma led Leroy to the waiting area with the crowd of other ladies waiting their turn for the preliminary competition. Only the top ten from tonight would move onto the finals tomorrow. Emma intended to be one of them. And boy did she need to work out some of this tension.

Emma's nerves rose higher and higher as her turn drew closer. As the minutes ticked down, nausea rose in her throat. This was her adult competition debut, in front of her home town audience, while representing them as their rodeo queen, with the guy who was completely throwing her off-kilter sitting front and center. What the hell was she getting herself into?

Finally it was time for her to line up in the chute. Her dad came up beside her and squeezed her hand. "You've got this, Emma. You're ready."

She took a deep breath and nodded.

"Come on," he said. "Kiss for luck."

Emma closed her eyes and leaned in. She felt her father's large hand cradle the back of her head and his warm lips on her cheek, and a flood of calm washed over her.

She'd done this a thousand times. He was right. She had this.

Once in the chute she continued to breath deep, savoring the intoxicating sensation of her heart racing and her whole body ramping up in preparation for the sudden burst of speed. Leroy shared her eagerness—he stomped and snorted, tossing his head restlessly.

At last her name rang over the loudspeakers—complete with a shout-out to her hometown rodeo queen status.

She clamped her teeth together and tightened her grip on the reins. Time to fly.

The horn sounded and she kicked her heels. Leroy's firm muscles tensed and let loose. They sprang across the line.

Time slowed down, with the noise of the crowd fading to a whisper behind the pounding of Leroy's hooves and the sound of her own breath sucking in and pushing out. She leaned, rising in her stirrups, as they rounded the first barrel. 

They made a tight, clean circle—close to her bent knee but not too close, and then surged forward toward the second barrel. Another clean circle and onto the third barrel. A final clean circle—perhaps a tad too wide, but not a huge mistake. Then back to the straightaway. The noise of the crowd swelled in her ears again as Leroy pounded across the line.

She reined Leroy in and leaned forward to put and rub his neck. "Good boy. Best boy. You were so wonderful."

Her heart continued to race as she sat back and circled Leroy around so she could get a glimpse of the scoreboard. Her time flashed in bright, gold lights. "16.15 seconds."

She raised her arm in the air and whooped. Her dad ran up with a grin on his face. "Great time, kiddo, great time! You'll make the top ten for certain."

Emma shared his confidence. Sure enough, once all the times were posted, hers was fifth highest. 

"I'll do even better in the finals," she said, squeezing her dad's hand.

"I know you will."

After getting Leroy back into his trailer she checked her phone.

Two texts from Killian. She smiled.

**K:** Hell of a ride

**K:** This rodeo has given me the best sixteen seconds of my life

Emma shook her head. She texted back.

**E:** Tonight was pretty awesome for me, too.

A moment later – 

**K:** I didn't mean tonight, darling

Emma laughed. His flirting was out of control—but as she remembered the way she felt after the kiss last night, she almost agreed with him.

Her father stepped around the trailer and raised his eyebrows at her. "What's so funny?"

She shook her head. "Nothing. Just a text."

In the cab of the truck beside her dad she sent a reply text.

**E:** Going home. Leroy needs his beauty sleep. See you tomorrow?

**K:** You can count on it. Front and center.

She fell asleep that night with a smile on her face.

~ ~ ~

Emma was up bright and early for the grand parade. Standing up on that float as Queen was a buzz altogether different from the rush of competition. Seeing the people cheer and wave—seeing the little girls jump up and down with delight—it warmed her heart. 

Unfortunately it was a crazy hot day. By the time the parade ended she was exhausted, and she had a few more obligatory appearances to make. She didn't get a break until mid-afternoon. She managed a short nap, but still felt tired and sore when it was time to load Leroy up to head back to the rodeo grounds.

Didn't matter. She'd competed tired before. She'd just have to push through it.

At the opening ceremony she caught sight of Killian. This time he was in the very front row. She grinned. At least she had her own very special cheering section.

When her turn to compete approached she got her usual kiss of luck from her dad and moved into the chute.

Her heart started to pound. Go time.

The horn sounded and Leroy charged forward. 

One barrel clean… two… on the third barrel they swung wide, kicking up more dust then they should. But then they dashed through the straightaway and across the line.

She circled Leroy around as her dad jogged up and they stared up at the board together. The best time so far tonight was 15.3. All she had to do was come close to place in the top three. She held her breath.

16.78

Her heart sank and she blinked away the tears rising in her eyes. She might not even make the top five with that time.

She felt her dad's hand grip her ankle.

"It's okay, honey. This was your first adult competition, and that's still a damn fine time. You might still place."

She swallowed the lump in her throat and nodded, but he knew as well as she did that the chances of placing were slim. She slid down from the saddle and slowly led Leroy out to the cool-down area. 

She glanced at the scoreboard a few more times, taking heart when two ladies got times just over 17 seconds, but then one competitor clocked in at 14.9 and Emma knew it was all over. She didn't check the board again until the final results were posted. Out of the ten finalists, she'd come in fourth.

Emma lifted her chin, fought back her tears, and pasted a smile on her face while she went to congratulate the top three competitors, and then, in turn, the other finalists. She might be disappointed, but she was still rodeo queen, and she had the honor of her whole town to uphold. The winners and other finalists were all gracious and warm, but the experience drained Emma of all her remaining energy.

She dragged her feet while helping her dad to guide Leroy back into his trailer, and cringed every time she caught sight of the huge "Nolan Ford" painted on the side. It was like a giant advertisement for her failure. _She's right here, the girl who wasn't quite good enough._

Emma fought back another surge of tears that welled up in the corners of her eyes. She knew she was being melodramatic. She'd always told herself that the thrill of the competition was more important than victory. But she couldn't deny it—she wanted to win for her home crowd. She just hadn't realized how badly she wanted it until it became an impossibility.

Her dad came up and put a hand on her shoulder. "Do you want to go back up to the box? They still have a seat saved for the queen up there."

Emma drew in a sharp breath. She couldn’t face all those rodeo VIPs right now. She just couldn't. "Not yet. I think I'll take a short walk—get some air."

"Okay. Emma—" he gave her a tender look, "I'm so proud of you. You've been absolutely amazing all week long."

She managed a smile and wrapped her arms around him in a warm hug. "Thanks."

He stepped back and patted her shoulder one more time. "Okay. I'll see you after the awards."

She sighed as he walked away. The awards. The awards that she had to help present. To the ladies who beat her. Perfect.

Emma strolled to the edge of the staging area, weaving in and out of all the hustle and bustle, and wrapped her arms around herself. There was no real chill in the air—though it was only mid-June, the day had been in the mid-80s and the warmth still lingered on the light breeze. She stood by the perimeter fence and stared up at the sky. 

The bright swath of stars that she could see from the property behind her house was slightly obscured by the bright lights of the rodeo grounds, but she could still pick out a few familiar constellations—the big and little dipper and Orion. She sighed again and wished, just for a moment, that the wide black sky would open up and swallow her whole.

"Emma?"

She turned, her eyes widening in surprise. Killian stood a few feet behind her, a tentative smile on his face. "How'd you get through the gate?" she asked. Normally only competitors and their support teams could come into the staging area.

"I charmed my way in," he replied, smiling a little wider.

"I'm sure you did." Her lips curved up. He could probably charm his way into almost anywhere.

He took a few steps closer. "I just wanted to see you. I thought…" He shook his head. "I don't know what I thought. I just wanted to see you."

The tears burned in her eyes again, and a lump rose in her throat. She shook her head. Her voice quavered when she spoke. "I really wanted to win."

He stepped a little closer, his face growing more serious, his voice rich with sincerity and understanding. "I know you did. I know."

After fighting them back for nearly an hour, she finally let the tears roll down her cheeks. An instant later Killian's arms were around her, pulling her close. She clung to him and buried her face against his shoulder. His embrace was strong but tender, and he stroked her hair gently while her body shook with repressed sobs.

He didn't try offering her any words of comfort or platitudes that next time would be better—he simply held her and let her cry and cry until she was finally done. Once the wave of disappointment and sadness had passed she took a few deep breaths to finish calming herself. She let go of Killian and took a small step back.

He dropped his arms and let her go, but didn't move away from her. Instead he smiled down at her, still so close they were practically touching.

Emma wiped her damp cheeks with her hands and smiled back up at him. "Thank you. I guess I just needed to get that out."

"It's okay," he said softly. "I'm happy to be of service."

She huffed a half-laugh. "Yeah. Thanks. I, uh, know it's immature to be so disappointed. Almost no one wins their first adult-level competition. I guess it's just been a really long week and the exhaustion and nerves finally got me."

"Don't worry about it." Killian gave his head a little shake. "Happens to everyone. And hey, you survived. Live on to kick ass another day, right?"

This time her laugh was more genuine. "Yeah. You got that right."

She wiped her cheeks one more time. "God, I must look like a mess."

"Not at all." He grinned. "You're just glowing with emotion."

She laughed again. His teasing was exactly what she needed right now. Emma had never had an easy time opening up about to emotions to people—not even to her family. But there was something about Killian that put her at ease. "I guess the waterproof mascara did the trick."

He gave her an appraising look that sent sparks flying through her body. "It sure did. You feeling better, now?"

"Much better, yes. Thank you." Her heart beat a little faster.

He danced his fingers over her hip, sending even more sparks through her core. "Do you want to get out of here?"

_Yes_. But she couldn't—no matter how much she wanted it. "I wish I could." Her shoulders slumped a little. "But this Queen's work isn't done yet. I need to be there for the awards and closing ceremony."

He looked up dramatically. "Okay. I understand. You're not the type to blow off a responsibility."

Emma rolled her eyes. "Not this time, at least."

He smirked. "But perhaps some other time?"

She folded her arms. "We'll see."

She reiterated her promise to go to his derby the next day—sitting front and center—and then walked with him back to the gate, their fingers brushing against each other the whole way. Though the normal noise and chaos of the staging area surrounded them, Emma didn't notice any of it. With Killian she was in as much a bubble of her own reality as she ever was when racing on Leroy's back.

It was her own little world.

Later that evening when Emma stood on the stand to help present the awards she happily wore a broad smile the entire time—even when she was awarding the women who'd bested her.

As Killian said—live to kick ass another day.

 

Tbc


	4. Chapter 4

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Crazy long chapter, but I don't feel like breaking it up. So I understand if it takes folks a few days to get to it—you need a good long stretch to sit down and take your time with it. This is the first of 2 chapters that I like to think of as young Emma's sexual awakening. I think I still managed to keep things at a "T" rating, but if any of you think I crossed the line into "M," kindly let me know, and I'll be happy to adjust the rating accordingly. Once again, much thanks to mrsracerx for her insight into the world of demolition derby. I probably didn't get every detail right, but I hope I came close enough!

Emma dragged Ruby to the derby a full 45 minutes early to be sure they could find seats exactly where she'd promised—front and center. She chose the second row back, just so they wouldn't be too close to the action, and they settled in, spreading a blanket on the hard bleacher-seat and depositing sunglasses and other sundries to mark their ownership. Then they wandered over to a spot by the fence around the pit area where they had a good view of the drivers unloading their cars.

"Do you know which one is Killian's?" Ruby asked, surveying the collection of ramshackle, stripped-down, ten and twenty year old vehicles.

Emma shook her head, smiling at the memory of Killian's response when she asked him how to recognize his car. "He said I'd know it when I saw it."

Ruby raised an eyebrow, but didn't say anything. They craned their necks, surveying the various cars being moved into groups. A rough-looking black station wagon caught Emma's eye, and she laughed and pointed. "That one's his. The pirate car."

A vivid white-painted skull and crossbows adorned the hood of the wagon.

"Killian has a thing for pirates," Emma added.

Ruby shook her head without a word. She certainly approved of Killian's looks, but so far she couldn't fathom why Emma might be interested in him as more than a short-term fling. Emma hadn't been entirely certain she wanted more than a fling, either, until Ruby had brought up the concept that afternoon and Emma found herself defending him as legit boyfriend-material. The realization that she wanted something real still sat uncomfortably in her gut. She really didn't need another anchor to Storybrooke right now—not when she was gearing up to leave.

But she didn't want to pass up this chance for _something_ , either. Though only time would tell what that _something_ would turn out to be.

The stands started to fill up, so after buying a few sodas they headed back to their seats to make sure no one tried to move their things. As the start time drew closer Emma bounced her knees anxiously. A little nagging feeling in her brain told her that there was something she needed to do before the derby started.

Abruptly she stood. "Hey—keep our seats. I'll be back in about ten minutes. There's just something I need to take care of first."

Ruby raised her eyebrows again, but didn't protest.

Emma found the entrance to the pit area without much trouble. A security guy at the gate stopped her. "Hey—only drivers and crew allowed."

Emma squared her shoulders, lifted her chin, and grinned. "Oh, you must not have gotten the message. I'm Emma Nolan—Queen of the Outlaw Rodeo. They wanted me to come by before the derby to thank all the drivers for participating and wish them all good luck." She'd never told such a blatant lie before in her life, and was amazed at how easily it came for her.

"Really?" The security guy narrowed his eyes.

"Oh," Emma gasped, feigning innocence. "I forgot my sash! I'm supposed to wear it to all official functions and I totally spaced and forgot it in my car. Will I have time to run back and get it and still talk to the drivers, or are we running out of time?"

The security guy's lips were tight, but he nodded. "Naw. Starting time is close. I guess I'll just let you in. But make it quick, okay?"

"Yes, sir," Emma said with a nod and flounced past him.

To keep up the show she smiled and waved at all the drivers she passed, but she had only one destination in mind.

A few moments later she reached the black, pirate-emblem bearing station wagon. A lean figure in protective coveralls leaned against it talking to Pete Locksley. Pete's eyes went wide when he caught sight of her, and Killian quickly turned to see what his uncle was staring at.

His face broke out in one of the brightest grins she'd ever seen. "How'd you get back here?"

She tucked her hands into her back pockets and smirked up at him. "I charmed my way in."

He laughed loud and hard. "God damn, Emma Nolan—I'm starting to suspect you might have a little pirate in you."

She shrugged. "Maybe I do."

Killian ambled a little closer, his eyes riveted on her as if nothing else in the world mattered. "So why'd you decide to pay this little visit?"

"I thought I could do something to help you," Emma said, her heart pounding ever harder against her ribs—she wondered if she could really work up the nerve to do this. But she'd made it this far…

"What?" He raised an eyebrow.

She took a deep breath. Now or never. In one swift move she reached up to grab the collar of his coveralls a pulled him in for a firm, fierce kiss.

Fire surged up and down her whole body as he responded, pulling her even closer. God, the things this man did to her. She'd never imagined anything like it.

At last she pulled herself back, panting. She fought back the temptation to go in for more, knowing that if she did she'd never want to stop.

She stepped back, licking her lips, and looked up at his dumbstruck expression. She smiled. "A kiss for luck. Now go smash some cars for me."

He blinked a few times and then smiled. "Aye, captain."

With her heart still leaping up her throat, Emma spun on her heels and strode, head held high, back to the gate. She winked at the security guy as she passed, and laughed at the puzzled expression on his face.

She'd never felt so bold or free in her life. She wasn't exactly sure what was happening to her—little miss responsibility was giving way to someone completely new. But whatever it was, she intended to enjoy it.

She and Ruby gasped and screamed and cheered at the mayhem of the first two heats, but she was really just waiting for Killian's appearance in heat three.

Each heat was ten minutes of destructive insanity, and either the last two cars standing or the two judged worthy by the officials would move on to the feature match at the end of the night. In between each heat bulldozers and tow trucks would come clear the arena for the next round.

At last heat three began. Emma stood up and cheered with wild abandon when Killian's car zoomed out into the ring. All the cars took their positions, and the starting horn sounded.

Emma let out a surprised shriek when Killian immediately charged into a battered green sedan at full speed, pushing the car all the way into the concrete-and-old-tire barrier. She gripped Ruby's hand as Killian then backed at high speed into the next nearest car. She'd told him to smash, and it seemed he intended to follow her orders to the fullest.

Her heart raced with every screech of metal—with every clang and crash, and each piece of flying debris. A few minutes in Killian's back bumper hung loose, dragging half-on half-off, and his car sported several new major dents, but some of the cars he'd taken on were completely disabled. He hung to the edges, evading major collisions for a about a minute and a half, giving his car a rest. He began testing the waters again with a few small bumps and bashes. Then, as the final minute arrived, he sped up for a few final spectacular collisions.

At the end of the round there was no doubt that he would be moving onto the feature, and Emma rose to her feet and cheered when his number was announced as one of the two finalists.

There were two more heats to go, along with a half-time trick-jumping motorcycle demonstration, before the feature. Emma's heart rate slowed a little once Killian was back in the pit, preparing his car for the feature. 

When she got up to get a snack from one of the vendors, she caught sight of Rob and Billy in the stands, with a pretty, dark-haired woman cuddled up against Rob. She must be the on-again-off-again girlfriend Killian had told her about—Marian. Emma waved, and Billy waved back with a silly grin on his face, and Rob smiled and nodded. From what Killian had told her they'd all be getting together at Pete's house afterward to either celebrate or commiserate, whichever the case would be. She'd convinced Ruby to come so she wouldn't be so outnumbered by Killian's friends. With Marian there Ruby would end up stuck with Billy. Emma had enough compassion to feel guilty—but not guilty enough to let Ruby out of joining them.

The rest of the heats were just as thrilling as first three had been, but Emma saved up her excitement for the feature.

Unlike the timed heats, the feature match was a last-car-standing battle to the bitter end.

The cars already looked rather battered from their heats. Emma noticed that Killian had completely pulled off the dangling back bumper from his heat. That left his wagon with less protection, but he seemed to think it was a risk worth taking.

The cars lined up, revving their engines. Emma squeezed Ruby's hand again as the starting horn sounded.

Within seconds the resounding clangs and crashes of cars slamming into each other filled the air. The feature proved even more violent and turbulent than the heats had been. Now the drivers held nothing back.

Emma gasped and gripped her bench seat when a large gray sedan t-boned Killian's wagon, pushing it several yards. She ignored the crashes and action happening elsewhere in the arena—she only had eyes for Killian. She simultaneously wondered how anyone sane could participate in a derby, and felt a vicarious rush of adrenaline surge through her body. If she could find a way to make the rush of a barrel ride stretch for more than the five minutes surrounding her competition runs, would she take it—even it if was insane? From way her spirit soared with every crash, she thought she just might go for it.

The sedan backed up slowly, dragging Killian's wagon back with it for a few seconds before the wagon wobbled free. 

The wagon sputtered for a few moments before Killian was able to zoom it out of the way of another devastating hit from the sedan.

Emma sucked her bottom lip into her mouth and jiggled her legs. Killian circled the perimeter for a few moments, catching a break from the action to regain his bearings, and then, without warning, he charged forward to slam into an already-battered yellow car, putting it out of commission once and for all. Emma found herself shouting and screaming with wild enthusiasm, greater than at any sport event she'd ever been to.

Killian was _her_ pirate, and damn it, she wanted him to win!

The gray sedan bashed the tires of another wagon until it could no longer roll, and Killian took aim at a blue and white stripped sedan, crumpling its side with a hard blow. The nose of the sedan hit the dirt as the front axle snapped. Another car out for the count.

Within a few more minutes of violent collisions, only two cars remained—the vicious gray sedan, and Killian's wagon.

Emma pounded her thighs with her fists to get out her nervous tension. He could it. He could take that guy.

The two circled and parried in a final dance of challenge. Both vehicles were battered and sputtering from the damaged they'd already taken.

Emma held her breath as both cars took positions across the ring from one another. Killian's white skull and crossbones were now barely recognizable on the bent and jiggling hood. Emma feared it might fly off at any moment.

Both drivers revved their engines, and charged.

Killian swerved at the last moment, clipping the left front corner of the gray sedan hard. The sedan went spinning into the nearest barrier while Killian limped forward, one of his front tires blown.

In spite of the blown tire, Killian managed to circle his wagon around.

The gray sedan lurched backward and forward, unable to remove itself from the wall.

Killian zoomed forward faster than Emma would have thought possible, smashing into the back tire of the sedan and wedging the vehicle even more securely against the barrier.

With a screeching sound of tearing metal, Killian backed away, a few bits of debris hanging from his front bumper.

The arena horn sounded. It was over. Killian had won.

Emma jumped to her feet, screaming and clapping with the rest of the crowd as Killian honked his horn in triumph and limped his car out of the arena unaided. Holy God, he'd done it! 

The thrill of his victory filled her with dizzying excitement that all but erased the disappointment of her own loss the previous night. She felt like she was floating.

The crowds began streaming out of the arena, and Emma and Ruby gathered up their things.

Billy waved them down as they headed toward the exit. "Hey! Emma! Come on to the pit with us!"

Emma smiled and led Ruby after him.

"Good to see you again, Ruby," he said with an odd smile.

Ruby raised her eyebrows and gave Emma a questioning look. She clearly had no memory of ever seeing Billy Smee before in her life. Emma cleared her throat. "Yeah, Ruby, you remember Killian's roommate, Billy, right?"

A look of comprehension dawned in Ruby's eyes. "Oh. Yes. Good to see you again, Billy."

Billy, not at all fooled, giggled. Ruby managed a tight smile beneath her glare.

They wound after Billy through the chaotic atmosphere of the pits until they reached where Killian, Pete, and Rob were busy pushing Killian's car up the ramp onto the trailer hitched to Killian's truck. Sweat dripped on his face and black streaks of grime covered his protective suit and marred his cheek and forehead. The men gave a final shove, pushing the wagon into place, when Killian caught sight of her. He turned his head to mutter something to Pete and then leaped down from the trailer and strode toward her, a wicked grin on his face and a look in his eyes that made her heart leap up into her throat.

Before Emma could say a word Killian's arms were around her, lifting her and spinning her in a circle while letting out a gleeful whoop before he bent, cupped her cheek and pulled her face toward his for a deep, forceful kiss that left her lips raw and throbbing even while they tingled with desire for more.

Emma heaved a few deep breaths as she met his eyes and grinned. Still floating from the after-affect of all that adrenaline, she was glad that his arm was still firm around her waist because her legs didn't feel altogether steady.

Killian's wicked grin returned. "I figured that kiss for luck beforehand worked out so well, I'd give it a try after, too."

Tingles danced in Emma's gut, just below her belly button. "Just what do you think you need luck for tonight?"

His gaze dropped to her lips and lingered for a few moments before rising back up to meet her eyes. "We'll see."

Oh God. She was in so far over her head.

This wasn't another awkward, geeky, fumbling high school boy who'd never made it past second base, like her previous boyfriends. Emma began to wonder with equal parts anticipation and anxiety what exactly Killian expected out of this relationship.

She and Ruby followed Killian's truck along with his friends' cars back to Pete's house, where everyone piled out with raucous joking and teasing.

Emma took a deep breath when she stepped out of her bug, and Ruby gave her a hard look. "You owe me big-time for this." 

Emma nodded. "I know."

Rob's step-mom, Wendy, greeted both Emma and Ruby with big hugs, and when introduced Marian smiled, but eyed Ruby warily. Great—a jealous girlfriend. Now Ruby really would be stuck with Billy. Emma sent a Ruby an apologetic smile, wondering how she could make it up to her.

Pete started passing around beers to most of the crowd, but wagged a finger at Emma and Ruby. "I'm afraid I don't allow underage drinking in my home, as these boys can testify. Here's some sodas for you ladies." 

Rob rolled his eyes and Killian shrugged with a smile as Pete offered them a choice of regular and diet sodas. Emma was perfectly happy to take a Diet Coke. She needed to keep her wits tonight.

Unfortunately, Killian didn't make it easy for her. After taking a few gulps of his beer he excused himself to the bathroom and reappeared a few minutes later in a clean outfit, his damp hair slicked back from his face, a few drops of water still clinging to his beard.

Emma raised her eyebrows, gawking. "Did you really just take the world's fastest shower?"

He chuckled. "Didn't want to miss out on all the fun." Then he took a seat on the stool beside her and lowered his voice. "Don't worry, love—I know how to take things nice and slow, too, when the situation demands." He winked, and a fresh flurry of tingles sparked beneath Emma's belly button.

For a few seconds the image of Killian standing stark naked in a warm shower flashed through her mind, and she gulped her soda to hide what she felt certain would be a rather hungry expression on her face.

Shit. What the hell was she getting herself into?

Wendy passed around some tortilla chips and a delicious homemade salsa while the guys reviewed the highlights of the derby, and then broke out their best derby stories (no doubt to impress the ladies). There were some shockers that left Emma staring with an open mouth. It was a wonder these men weren't all dead or maimed by now.

Killian grinned and nudged her shoulder with his. "I'd guess you have some pretty great rodeo, stories, too?"

A few of the others joined in, prodding her to share. First Emma told about a few big wins, but then she shared one of her favorite stories of all. "I was seven years old," she said, grinning at the memory, "and I was going up against this rival of mine—Zelena Miller."

"What the hell kind of name is Zelena?" asked Billy.

Emma shook her head. "Who knows? Ask her crazy parents. Anyway, before the competition she started talking a little smack to me. She told me I was nothing but a little wimpy cry-baby. And I hadn't learned how to talk smack back, so I just stood there feeling all hurt and scared and confused. It was awful. Then it came my turn to ride. I did pretty good around the first barrel, but then I bumped into the second barrel and knocked it clean over. I was so shocked that I reigned in my horse and we froze, right there in the middle of the arena."

Everyone started at her with wide eyes, except Ruby, who smiled. She knew the rest of the story.

"So after a second it occurred to me that if I gave up," continued Emma, "I would prove to Zelena that I really was the wimpy cry-baby that she thought I was. So I hopped off my horse, I stood that barrel back up, I remounted, and I finished the damn race."

Everyone started smiling now. Emma beamed at the recollection. "And when I crossed that finish line the whole crowd burst into applause and gave me a standing ovation. It was amazing. I felt on top of the world. So naturally I came in last, and Zelena came in second place. When she cornered me to rub it in my face I just frowned and said, so what if you won? I still got people to cheer louder for me than you did."

Everyone laughed, and Emma glanced over to see Killian staring at her with something that looked like admiration shining bright in his eyes. It was enough to make her heart do a flip in her chest.

Pete pulled out another round of beers, but instead of taking one, Killian rose to his feet and took Emma's hand. "We're gonna go get a little fresh air," he said, leading her through the sliding glass door at the back of the kitchen.

Emma didn't object—she didn't really want to object, no matter how many nervous butterflies decided to start migrating through her stomach.

The Locksley's had a beautiful backyard. Raised vegetable beds lined one fence, fruit trees stood tall and proud in the corners, several flower beds accented the edges of the lush lawn, and the large deck just outside the door was covered with a lovely pergola hanging with clematis vines that perfumed the night air with their scent.

Killian led her over to a cozy, cushioned, outdoor loveseat, and she took a seat next to him, her heart racing as fast as it ever did before a competition. 

He leaned toward her, his arm draped over the back of the loveseat behind her. He held her gaze and smiled. "How are you doing?"

She swallowed hard. "Good. I'm having fun. It's been really fun."

He nodded and leaned a little closer. "Good. Fun is good."

"Yeah, it's really—"

Emma lost all track of what she'd planned to say when his lips pressed against hers. She closed her eyes and sank into his embrace.

He shifted his arm behind her back to pull her ever closer until she practically sat in his lap, and Emma gasped against his lips. Her whole body was on fire. God, the things he did to her.

She caressed his cheek, savoring the burn of his rough beard against her palm, and opened her lips to pull him deeper.

The scent of a citrus-y soap filled her nose, and his kiss tasted faintly of beer. Delicious shockwaves ran up and down her spine when he tangled his fingers in her hair and caressed the back of her neck.

With every touch of his hands and every caress of his lips the heat inside of her blazed hotter. This was everything she'd ever imagined kissing could be and nothing it had ever been with anyone else. It was as if he knew exactly how to touch her—exactly how to taste her—like he was made to kiss her.

Being a normal healthy teenager, Emma was no stranger to lust. But she'd never known how powerful and intense it could be when she wanted the man she was with just as much as he wanted her.

Emma pushed her body even closer to his, running her hand over his chest and then up to his shoulder. She edged her leg up to overlap his thigh, and before she could stop herself a small whimper escaped her throat.

The sound seemed to urge him forward. His grip on the back of her head grew firmer and he pulled in her, kissing her with a smothering intensity that took her breath away. A moment later he pulled back slightly, ending the kiss, but she felt his nose brush against hers and his forehead rested against hers for just a moment before he pulled back a little further.

She opened her eyes to meet his gaze. His eyes looked bluer than ever, and the depth of emotion she saw in them sent shivers down her spine.

Both of them breathed heavily for a few seconds, catching their breath.

Emma didn't know what to say. How did you follow up something like _that_?

Killian spoke first. He gently brushed her hair back from her face and trailed his fingertips down her cheek and along her jaw. "You are so unbelievably amazing."

Emma smiled and let out a breathy half-laugh. She still had no idea what to say.

"You know what I want really badly right now?" he said.

Emma swallowed a lump in her throat and blinked rapidly. Oh boy. Would he ask her to come home with him? Did he think she'd be ready for that sort of thing already? What… how…?

Emma's mind stalled, but fortunately Killian's next words rescued her from that train of thought.

"I want to take you on a real date," he said, grinning.

Emma's eyes flew open wider. "Oh."

"You know, just us. No friends or family. I'll wear something nice, pick you up at your house, spend some money on you. Dinner and maybe some dancing. How does that sound?" His smile looked ridiculously eager.

Emma's cheeks felt warm with embarrassment. He'd told her he was a gentleman—she should have taken him at his word. Of course he wasn't going to pressure her to take things forward physically, yet. Like she'd told Ruby just that afternoon—he wasn't just a fling. He was boyfriend material. And he'd just proved it.

"That sounds wonderful," she said, managing to get a hold of her runaway imagination.

"Awesome. Tomorrow?" he asked, his eyebrows high. "Wait—no, not tomorrow. Billy had to miss a movie premiere this weekend. He worked Friday and Saturday, and then came the derby. So he made me promise to go with him on Monday. Sorry."

"Hey—a promise is a promise," she grinned. How adorable could he be?

Killian nodded. "Okay. Um—will Tuesday work?"

"Absolutely." 

"Perfect." His eyes lit up. "Pick you up at seven?"

"I'll be waiting."

They made their way back inside to rescue Ruby, their hands still clasped together.

~ ~ ~

"So we really don't know this guy?" her father called from the hall. "I thought we knew all the same guys you know."

Emma sighed and slid the curling iron out of her hair and picked up another section. She raised her voice to be heard. "He graduated a few years before me. You've never met him."

"Oh—so he's a college boy?"

Emma gritted her teeth at the eager sound in her father's voice. She let go of the new curl and picked up the final section of her hair. Why had she thought Killian picking her up at her house was a good idea? Oh yeah—because she'd been dizzy with lust, that's why. "He actually doesn't go to school. He works full time." Her dad was going to _love_ that.

She was met with nothing but silence. Not a good sign. She dropped her final curl and unplugged the iron. After a spritz of hairspray she tossed her curls a little to loosen them up. Perfect.

Through the closed bathroom door she heard the faint sound of the doorbell. "I'll get it!" she called. But she was too late.

By the time she made it down the stairs the door was already open and her dad was shaking Killian's hand.

"Good to meet you, sir," said Killian.

"Good to meet you, too, Killian. Come on in."

Killian stepped in just as Emma reached the foyer.

Her dad smiled. "Ah—here she is, now. Your young man is here, Emma."

Emma cringed. "Yeah. Hi." She waved, gratified by the look on Killian's face as he took in her short flower-print sun dress. He looked pretty darn good, too, in black fitted jeans and a dark navy button down shirt.

At that moment her mom stepped into the foyer from the hall to the kitchen. "Oh—hello!" she said brightly. "You must be Killian."

"Yes, ma'am," replied Killian, extended an arm to shake her hand. "Good to meet you, Mrs. Nolan."

Her mom beamed. Maybe they'd manage to escape without any embarrassment.

Then Emma saw her dad folding his arms and pursing his lips. Not a good sign.

"Let me just grab my purse," said Emma hastily, reaching for her bag on the side table in the hall, and hoping to curtail whatever her dad planned on saying. 

But her dad was determined to get it out. "So Emma says you're a working man, Killian. What do you do?"

Killian shifted on his feet a little. "I'm a junior mechanic, over at Locksley's Auto Repair."

Her dad nodded, and Emma could see the calculations going on behind his eyes. Blue collar worker. No college. But not entry level either. Emma squeezed her lips together and took a deep breath through her nose, waiting for the bomb to drop.

"Locksley's is a good shop. You boys do good work," said her dad.

"We do our best," replied Killian with his trademark winning smile.

Her dad's eyes narrowed. "So, just how old are you, son?"

Killian's smile faltered. "I'm, uh, twenty-two, sir."

Emma clenched her fists. Here it came.

Her dad's eyes got wide. "Twenty-two years old? So what the hell are you doing running around with my eighteen year old daughter?"

"Oh my God, Dad," said Emma just as her mom said, "David! Really?"

"It's a valid question!" her dad protested.

"No—it's not," her mom said, taking her dad's arm and pulling him back toward the kitchen. "Have a fun time, kids. It was nice meeting you, Killian," she called over her shoulder.

"Be back by midnight!" her dad shouted.

"Twelve-thirty?" Emma called back.

"Twelve-thirty is fine, hon," replied her mom.

"Come on, before my dad decides to overrule her," Emma said, pulling Killian out the door.

Killian looked somewhat shell-shocked as they climbed into his truck. "That was, uh…."

"Just my dad being himself. Sorry—I should have warned you," said Emma. "He does something like that every time I bring I guy over. Even with the guys he knew before I started dating them. He's just…" She searched for a description that wouldn't be too harsh. "Excessively overprotective."

"Ah," said Killian, pulling his truck away from the curb. "So it's not just me?"

"Nope. Not just you."

"That's a relief."

He took her to one of the nicer steakhouses in town, and she ordered her favorite prime rib. One nice thing about dating a guy with a full-time job—he had money to spend. 

The conversation came fast and easy. They talked about the careers of various rodeo celebrities that they followed, the Broncos' prospects for the coming football season, favorite foods, and all sorts of other things. When books came up, Killian surprised her.

"I mostly read historical biographies. You know—I like to learn about the great thinkers of history."

Emma eyed him suspiciously. "Come on—I know you read novels, too. You were reading a novel that day we ran into each other in the library."

He smiled guiltily like she'd caught him sneaking a beer out of his uncle's fridge. "Yes. I do read novels on occasion. I like… nautical books."

Emma raised her eyebrows. "What's a nautical book?"

He shrugged. "You know—adventures on old sailing ships. Like Forester's Horatio Hornblower books, or O'Brien's Aubrey-Maturin novels."

"I have no idea what those are," admitted Emma, shaking her head. "Don't you ever read anything normal? Like Harry Potter?"

"Never tried it. That's more Billy's kind of thing."

Her jaw dropped. "Are you serious? You've never read Harry Potter?"

He shook his head. "Sorry, love. Just never got around to it."

"Okay. This needs to be fixed. Let's make a deal." She held his eyes with a serious look. Harry Potter was required reading. She couldn't let him go on like this.

He smiled and stretched his hand across the table to twine his fingers with hers. "What sort of deal?"

"Next time I come over to your place, I'm bringing the first Harry Potter book. You're going to read it. And you can lend me one of your old timey sailing ship books and I'll read that. It's a fair trade."

He cocked his head and grinned. "You've got me there. It is a fair deal. I guess I'll have to accept."

After dinner they went to a club that was sixteen and older on Mondays-Thursdays. Tuesdays were always country swing night.

"I've got to warn you," Emma said as they walked to the dance floor, "I've only been a couple of times with friends. I just know the barest basics."

Killian positioned her hand on his shoulder with a grin. "Well, it's a good thing you've got a partner who knows what he's doing."

She never would have pegged him as a dancer. "You really know how to do all this?" she gestured at the couples spinning around the dance floor.

"Absolutely. See—I learned the basics from an ex, but then I found an even better teacher: Marian. She loves to dance, but poor Rob has two left feet. So she deemed me to be a worthy partner—taught me all kinds of moves."

Emma grimaced. "Well, you'd better keep it simple with me. I'm really not that great."

"Nonsense," he said, spinning her out onto the floor. "Just follow my lead and you'll be fine."

They started out with a few minutes of basic two-step. The firm pressure of his strong arms made it easy to follow his lead, and his murmured instructions helped her catch on quickly to some swing steps, spins, and even some dips. Emma couldn't wipe the grin from her face.

After they finished a series of spins and turns that she'd never have managed without his lead, Killian beamed at her. "See? I'd say you're a natural."

All through high school she'd been stressed about grades and extra-curricular and competition. Now, for the first time in her life, she felt like she could just relax and have fun. And she'd found the perfect person to share that fun with.

Every time they took a short break from the dancing for a rest or a drink, Emma smiled and waved at the few familiar faces in the crowd. She grinned at their stares—none of them would have guessed that uptight Emma Nolan would be out dancing on a Tuesday night with the best looking guy in town.

She had so much fun dancing and chatting with him that she completely lost track of time. It wasn't until the alarm on her phone went off that she snapped out of the magic of the evening. "Crap." She turned off the alarm. "12:15. That's my _time to hurry home_ alarm."

Killian sighed. "Then we'd better go. Don't want to give your dad any more reasons to hate me."

Emma laughed and squeezed his hand. "Yeah. We want him to get over that as soon as possible."

They made it back to her house with a few minutes to spare. A now-familiar thrill ran up and down her spine when Killian parked his truck and leaned over to kiss her.

After a minute of gentle kisses, Killian pulled back, combing his fingers through her hair. "When can I see you again?"

_Tomorrow_ , Emma wanted to blurt. Besides her daily training rides with Leroy her only commitment this summer was working four or five lunch shifts at Granny's diner every week with Ruby. And her next rodeo wasn't for two and a half more weeks. Not wanting to sound too eager, she said, "My evenings are wide open."

"Okay." Killian ran his thumb over her cheek and down to her chin. "Would tomorrow be too soon?"

Emma giggled. Thank God he was just as into this as she was. "No. It's not."

"Okay. I'll figure something out—maybe we could keep it simple. Get some take-out and watch a movie on Netflix or something."

She loved the idea of spending more time in his world—nothing fancy, just a chance to get to know him better. "That sounds perfect."

Emma twisted her fingers through his thick hair and kissed him again—and again…

She pulled back—a sudden paranoid thought shooting through her brain. She knew now what she wanted out of this relationship—a fun summer boyfriend. But what did he think they were doing?

"Killian? What is this thing that we're doing?" she asked. "I mean—are you still seeing other people?"

Killian's face grew somber and he swallowed before shaking his head slightly. "I haven't even thought about seeing anyone but you since that night I picked you up on the side of the road."

A giddy shiver ran through her chest and she couldn't repress the broad smile on her face.

Killian narrowed his eyes. "Why? You're not seeing anyone else, are you?"

She giggled again. "No. Absolutely not."

"Good." His smile returned and he traced his fingers over her shoulder and down her sides, sending sparks through her abdomen.

"So," she tilted her head, "are we officially a thing, then?"

She held her breath for a moment.

"Well, I certainly wouldn't object to being called your boyfriend, if you want," he teased.

She let out her breath and laughed again. "Good. I like that."

"I like it, too." He pulled her in for another kiss.

Eventually she pulled away. "I really need to get inside before my dad throws a fit."

"Okay—see you tomorrow."

She went inside and walked upstairs with her head spinning and a giddy smile on her face. So Killian Jones was her boyfriend, now. She really liked the sound of that. She knocked on her parents' door. "I'm home," she called.

"Thanks for checking in," said her mom in a groggy voice. "Did you have fun?"

"Yes. It was great. Goodnight."

"Goodnight, honey."

Emma sank onto her own bed with a smile. She had no idea if this thing with Killian could outlast the summer—but whether it did or not she intended to enjoy every moment of it.

~ ~ ~

Take-out and Netflix on Wednesday (along with the promised exchange of Harry Potter and one of Killian's sailing ship books) was followed by texting all Thursday evening in spite of the fact that Emma was supposed to be having a girl's night with Ruby and Killian was supposed to be working on derby cars with Rob. 

On Friday Killian and his boys had a backyard cookout. When he invited her, Killian told Emma to wear a swimming suit, and when she arrived she saw why. Billy, who worked at Walmart, had brought home several slip-n-slides and a few inflatable pools and they'd turned their scraggly back lawn into a water park. But it wasn't the impromptu water park that made her stop and stare—it was the sight of Killian in nothing but a pair of blue swimming trunks and his signature pendants hanging around his neck. She felt an immediate fire blaze up between her legs. Wow.

He caught sight of her and smiled broadly, waving her over. It was all she could do to stop herself from running her hands over his whole body when he leaned in to give her a quick kiss hello. Not in public. She had to restrain herself.

Marian was there along with several other guys and girls. Though Emma knew she was the youngest there, everyone seemed happy to welcome her.

When she took off her semi-sheer red cover-up to reveal her black halter-top bikini, she was gratified with the way Killian froze, a glassy-eyed expression on his face, his mouth falling partly open, as his eyes took her in. She smiled, winked at him, and ran for the nearest slip-n-slide.

They spent the next hour frolicking in the water—sliding, splashing and even shooting each other with water guns. Then Rob fired up the grill and he and Killian stepped up to play chef for the evening, grilling up burgers and brats for everyone.

When Emma stepped up to the cooler to get a drink, she went ahead and helped herself to a beer. There was no one here to tell her no—and this was all part of the "enjoying every minute" experience.

Even though she drank it with her meal, the beer left her feeling a little light-headed and giddy. 

After dinner Billy set up a free-standing fire bowl and lit a campfire. Their pal, a big guy named John, pulled out a guitar, and every sat around the fire chatting and singing along with his music. Killian pulled Emma into his lap in a folding canvas camp-chair, and it tottered slightly before she got settled. She hadn't put her cover-up back on, and he still hadn't put on a shirt, so her flesh was pressed up against his, filling her with tingles of delight. 

Killian traced tiny circles on the skin of her back as they sat enjoying the fire. Pretty soon the fire wasn't the only source of heat—the warmth between Emma's legs blazed and pulsed. This man was going to drive her absolutely insane.

She shifted her stance to snuggle closer to his chest, making it almost impossible for him to keep rubbing her back like that. The shift helped a little—but only a little.

As the rest of the group got caught up in a song Emma didn't know the words to, she gave into the impulse to run her fingers through Killian's chest hair. She loved the feeling of his flesh so solid and firm beneath her fingertips. Killian smiled down at her when she closed her fingers around his pendants.

"Having a good time?" he asked.

"You bet I am," she replied.

"Good," he replied, and planted a light kiss on her forehead. 

Emma smiled and bounced his pendants in her palm. Out of curiosity she peered at them—the skull and crossbones she'd seen plenty of times, but she'd never looked closely at his dog tags. Her eyes narrowed, making out the words in the dim light.

"Who's Liam Jones?" she asked. Or was Liam a nickname for Killian? But she'd never heard anyone call him that.

Killian shifted beneath her and pulled the pendants out of her hand. "My brother," he said, just above a whisper.

"I didn't know you had a brother," Emma said. That was the sort of thing people usually mentioned while you were getting to know them, but he'd never said anything.

Killian, his voice still low, replied, "He was killed in action in Afghanistan five years ago."

Emma's mouth fell open as she struggled for a reply. "I—I'm sorry. I shouldn't have… I…"

"It's okay," said Killian, wearing a smile. He took her hand and lifted it to his face to place a kiss across her knuckles. "Really. It's fine. There was no way you could have known."

Emma bit lightly on her bottom lip and nodded. She snuggled back up against him as the group launched into a new song, but Emma's mind was elsewhere.

No matter how much she cared about him, she'd really only known him for less than a month. There was still so much she didn't know about him or his past. Emma felt like she was an open book—but Killian still had so many mysteries. When would he open up to her?

Later, after the air grew cooler, Emma wandered back to the patio where she'd left her cover-up draped over a chair. Killian followed. 

She pulled it on, but the thin filmy fabric didn't provide much warmth. She wrapped her arms around her body and shivered.

"Hey, let's go get you a sweater, or something. I could use a shirt, too," said Killian.

They got inside just in time to see Rob and Marian slipping down the hall, hand in hand.

Emma paused, and Killian smirked. "I hope he remembers to turn on his stereo." He glanced at Emma. "That's our signal—loud music and a closed door equals _do not disturb_."

Emma's eyes went wide as understanding kicked in. "Oh."

She followed Killian down the hall to his room, and sure enough, the stereo in another room turned on, playing at a pretty high volume. Emma felt her face getting warmer.

Killian flicked the light on in his room and she followed him inside. It was cleaner than she'd expected. A small desk with a closed lap-top, a dresser, a queen bed somewhat untidily made (but still made), and a bookcase lined with books, a few action figures, and a model sailing ship.

She smiled as she looked around the otherwise sparsely decorated room. So this was bachelor life.

Killian opened his closet and rifled through just as the sound of muffled laughter and the tell-tale creak of bedsprings joined the sound of music from down the hall. Emma shivered again, and stared at Killian's bed. How many girls had he brought into that bed? How often had he used the loud-music signal?

Sparks flared between her legs at the thought, and she shifted on her feet nervously.

"Here, this ought to do," said Killian, handing her a gray cardigan.

She forced her eyes away from the bed. "Yeah. That'll be perfect." 

She slipped into the large, warm cardigan that smelled faintly of Killian's body wash, while Killian pulled on a tee shirt. Emma had to roll up the cuffs a bit on the too-long sleeves, but otherwise the sweater was perfect—not just to keep her warm. She could certainly use a little more fabric between her and Killian right about now. As much as the thought of sleeping with him might excite her, they'd only really been together for about two weeks. She wasn't going to move that fast.

At the beginning of Emma's senior year her mother had taken her to a gynecologist for a checkup and a birth control prescription. She'd told Emma that girls her age started making important decisions about things like sex, and she ought to be prepared ("But don't tell your father.") Emma had been grateful for such an understanding, forward-thinking mom, but she'd been decidedly uninterested in putting the effectiveness of her contraceptives to the test with any of the high school guys she knew. She'd briefly dated a classmate for about a month in the fall, but they never got close to sex. And she hadn't dated anyone since. Not until Killian.

For a while now Emma had been thinking she'd wait to make her sexual debut until college. She wasn't overly romantic about it—she had no expectations of her first time being about true love, or any kind of love, really. Her plan was to find a nice older guy with a little experience so that at least one of them knew what they were doing, wait until they'd been dating for a while so she knew he was in it for more than just a little between the sheets action, and then take the step. 

It had seemed like such a mature, sensible plan.

It still did. 

But Emma was starting to wonder if she might want to move up her time table a little bit. The perfect guy for the job might be right in front of her.

But not tonight. She was really not ready for tonight.

They headed back outside to join the group in making s'mores—but the way Killian pulled her fingers to his mouth to suck off the sticky chocolate and marshmallow didn't help calm the fire between her legs one bit.

When Emma finally made it home an hour and a half later, after checking in with her parents she went straight to the shower.

With the hot water running over her naked body she slid one hand between her legs, and let her mind run wild with images of Killian's body next to hers.

She closed her eyes and clenched her teeth as the pressure and heat in her core rose steadily until at last she shuddered and gasped with release.

Emma pushed the wet hair back from her face and took a few deep breaths. Yeah. Waiting until college was totally not going to happen.

~ ~ ~

Killian had to work a Saturday shift, and that evening they went to a movie—safe territory.

Emma spent Sunday with her family. After dinner that evening, while she was loading the dishes, her dad leaned against the counter and folded his arms.

"So," he said, "I had lunch with Sheriff Humbert yesterday. We had an interesting conversation."

"Oh yeah," said Emma disinterestedly, knowing full well that her dad would go on with his story whether she cared or not. Being on the city council, he hung out with a lot of city bigwigs. It was never very interesting.

"I mentioned your new boyfriend to him."

Emma froze. What?

She turned to face her dad, a plate still in her hand.

"Do you know what he said?" asked her dad, his face as serious as she'd ever seen it.

"What?" she asked, though she thought she knew the answer.

"He said that close to five years ago he arrested Killian Jones for assault with a deadly weapon. The D.A. originally wanted to try him as an adult but somehow he and his lawyer managed to work out a plea that put him in juvie for most of a year instead." Her dad held her gaze.

Emma took a deep breath and set the plate down in the sink. She dried her hands on a towel.

"Emma," her dad prodded, "did you know about this?"

The tidbit on assault with a deadly weapon was new. It sent a shiver down her spine. She couldn't imagine Killian hurting anyone. She met her dad's eyes. "Yes. I knew he spent time in juvie."

"And you started dating him anyway? Emma—this guy is a convicted criminal! I don't know if I trust my only daughter with someone like that."

"He was seventeen," Emma said defensively. "And he hasn't been in any trouble with the law since he got out. He finished high school. He has a good job. He's a good person. I trust him."

Her dad shook his head. "I'm not sure if you should."

"Well, I do," she insisted. Killian had never given her any reason not to trust him. If he'd wanted to use her or take advantage of her he'd had plenty of opportunities, and he'd always behaved like a gentleman. (Not that sharing that information with her dad would make this conversation any easier.) "He told me that none of the rumors are true. He made a dumb mistake as a teenager, but he paid the price and cleaned up his life and moved on. I thought you believed in second chances?" She frowned.

Her dad shook his head. "It's a little harder to give second chances when my daughter's safety is involved. So if the rumors about him aren't true, what is the true story? Do you even know?"

Emma clenched her teeth. There was no way she was going to admit ignorance on this point. She folded her arms in front of her chest. "The true story is none of your business. They seal juvenile records for a reason, Dad. Seriously. You need to stop being so paranoid. I trust Killian and I'm not going to stop seeing him just because you found out he made a dumb mistake in high school."

Her dad's face darkened. "Fine. But I'll be watching him. If that boy steps out of line just once, he won't be welcome in your life anymore."

Emma scowled, and her jaw dropped. "Oh come on. You can't make those kinds of decisions for me."

"As long as you're living under my roof, I can."

That was enough. "Good thing I won't be living here much longer, then," she declared. She couldn't take any more of this conversation. "I'm going to bed. Good night."

Her dad didn't say anything as she stormed off to her room. It took her a few hours of listening to music and reading to cool down. The thing that bothered her the most was that for as much of an ass as her dad was being, he'd also gotten her wondering exactly what Killian did. Assault with a deadly weapon was serious business. What had really happened, back then?

Emma rubbed her forehead. Stupid Dad. This was the last thing she wanted to be thinking about.

Eventually she realized she was thirsty. It was past when her parents normally went to bed, so she quietly stepped into the hall and crept down the stairs.

A light was still on. She paused, listening to the voices of her parents drifting down the short hall from the kitchen.

"David, you know pushing her won't help matters any. It'll just drive her further away and we won't know anything that's going on in her life. Is that really what you want?" said her mom.

"No. I don't. But I just don't know what to do with her anymore. Am I really supposed to be okay with the fact that my daughter is dating a criminal?"

Emma gritted her teeth to bite back a huff of frustration.

"A _reformed_ criminal," chided her mom. "You really need to give him the benefit of the doubt."

"Easier said than done," growled her dad.

At least her mom was on her side. Or so Emma thought, until her mom spoke again. "Anyway, this won’t last long. I'm sure it'll be over by the end of the summer. Emma's just going through her bad-boy phase. All girls have one. It's for the best she's getting it out of her system now, instead of during school when it could get in the way of her studies."

"I hope you're right," answered her dad.

Emma didn't want to hear any more. She crept back up the stairs and got a quick drink from the bathroom sink before returning to bed.

A "bad-boy phase." Was that really all they thought of Killian?

She squeezed her pillow and tried to sleep, but a nagging fear persisted at the back of her mind. What if they were right?

~ ~ ~

Monday evening she and Killian had his place to themselves. Billy was working and Rob was out with Marian.

"I need to show you something," Killian said after she arrived. He tugged on her hand and pulled her back to his room. He sighed and pointed as his desk. A pile of well-worn Harry Potter paperbacks sat there.

Emma grinned. "What's this?"

Killian shook his head. "You were right, sweetheart. I can't put them down. I flew through the one you lent me. I was done by Friday, but I didn't want to admit it. I thought maybe it was a fluke. Maybe the other books wouldn't be like that. So I borrowed them from Billy." He grinned and shook his head. "I have to confess—I'm already on book 3 and still going strong. You were right. It is required reading."

Emma laughed and wrapped an arm around his waist. "I told you so."

He rolled his eyes. "Yeah, I thought that's what you'd say. That's why I didn't tell you until now. But there's no more hiding it. You've converted me. Now we'll have to start watching the movies."

"They're not as good as the books," Emma warned. 

"They never are," Killian agreed. "Now how is your venture into the work of Patrick O'Brien going?"

Emma gave a guilty shrug. "I'm trying. Really. It's just hard to read a book with no women."

"There's no accounting for taste," he said, shaking his head.

Emma laughed again. But she had a tight knot in her chest that had been there all day. She needed to get this conversation over with now, or it would eat her up inside.

"Hey—changing the subject, there's something I need to ask you," she said.

"Sure. What's up?" He smiled.

Emma knew that smile wouldn't last long once she asked her question. She hated this— _hated it_. But she had to know. "My, uh, dad was pestering me about us. He heard some things…" She shook her head. "Some things about your past. Your arrest. And just… what really happened back then? Will you tell me?"

Just as she feared, his face fell. He broke contact and back away from her. His eyes were hard and his jaw set. She'd never seen him look so grim before.

"Well," he said in a flat voice. "This was bound to come up eventually, wasn't it? Though I confess I'd begun to hope it wouldn't. But I guess that was too much to ask for."

Her throat felt tight. "I'm sorry. I hate brining up painful topics. But my dad isn't just going to let this drop. I need to be able to tell him with complete confidence that you aren't a violent criminal. I mean—I already did. But I'm pretty sure I'll have to do it again. Please?"

He looked at the ground. "Do you really need your dad to approve of me?"

"No," she said firmly. "But… I would like it."

Killian raised his face again, his expression still hard and cold. "Would it be enough if I admit that I hurt someone, but not badly, and I haven't been violent toward anyone since? At least, outside of the derby grounds?"

Emma took a deep breath, pondering for a moment. She wanted to take him at his word. She really did. But… "I need some real ammunition to use against my dad if he starts badgering me. I want to trust you, Killian."

"And you don't." His voice rasped low, in a tone she'd never heard before. Pain glinted clear in his eyes.

"I do," she insisted, knowing how shallow she must sound. "But it's going to be harder to keep on trusting you if you won't at least give me an idea of what happened."

She could see his muscles tensing. "Fine," he said. "You want to know what happened? All the gory details?"

She'd hurt him. Every word—every gesture—screamed out how much he was aching inside. Damn it. She hadn't wanted it to go like this. But she needed answers. "I'm sorry," she said weakly.

He shook his head and turned away from her. A hollow laugh rang from his chest. "No. I get it. Things are heating up and you need to make sure you're safe with me. I get it. I just… Fuck." He rubbed his face.

Emma didn't know what to say. Her jaw hung slack as she searched for the words.

Killian spoke first. "Unsurprisingly it all goes back to a woman. Well—not just a woman. Damn it."

He shook his head, still not looking at her. "My mom died when I was eleven," he said, his voice once again taking on that unfamiliar rasp. "Dad wasn't in the picture, so Uncle Pete and Wendy took me in—me and my brother. When we got older, Liam wanted to make something of himself. He saw the army as a way to become a real man, and to pay for college at the same time. Instead he died at the side of road half a world away fighting a war that makes no sense in a country that doesn't want us." He choked on his words and shook his head again.

"I was 17. Almost done with my junior year. When we got the news I started falling apart. Barely passed my classes. Started drinking. Smoking weed. Started acting up—fighting. Vandalism. Trespassing. Street racing. Stupid immature crap to take out my anger any way I could." Killian sighed. "And toward the beginning of that summer, I met a woman. Milah. I picked her up in a coffee shop—offered to pay for her drink. And she took me up on it. I…"

He rubbed his face again and paced a few more steps away, but finally turned toward Emma. He lifted his gaze. His eyes were full of pain—and, strangely, a note of apology. "She was 21. At the time it made me feel like a big man, to get a mature, experienced woman like that to date me. I never once questioned why a grown woman would be dating a high school kid like me. But looking back later I think I figured it out. See, she'd just come out of a relationship with a controlling, abusive man. And he was still stalking her. Threatening her. And I think she liked being in a relationship where _she_ was the one in control. Where she had someone who worshipped the ground she walked on and was completely wrapped around her little finger."

Emma's chest felt tight. She couldn't imagine going through the things he went through. She couldn't blame him for acting out. She probably would have done the same.

Killian shrugged. "Anyhow, to make a long story short, uh… her ex started harassing me, too. He was after both of us. Milah was scared. And me, being the super mature and rational 17 year old that I was, I decided that the best way to sent him a message was to slash the tires of his car and scratch up his paint." He smiled bitterly and rolled his eyes. "Of course he knew it was me. A few days later he showed up at the garage with a baseball bat. He caught me out back of the shop when I showed up for work after school. Came after me with a baseball bat. I managed shout for help and dodged him a few times. Then I grabbed the bat when he swung it at me, and pushed it back up at his face. Broke his nose. And naturally that's right when the cops showed up."

Emma bit her bottom lip, her eyebrows knitting. God. She could see how much it was hurting him to relive all this.

"Anyway," Killian continued, "he had money and a good lawyer, and we just had the best Pete could manage to pay for. After a little negotiation plus Milah's statements about the stalking and harassment the D.A. was willing to reduce charges, but not drop them. And my lawyer wasn't sure a jury would buy my self-defense argument given the fact that I'd vandalized the dude's car. So I took a plea that sent me to juvie. And that's how I spent what should have been my senior year." He smiled.

"I'm so sorry, Killian. I shouldn't have—"

"Hey," he interrupted, an edge of bitterness in his voice, "I'm not done, yet. You wanted the gory details, sweetheart. So I'm gonna give them to you. You see, after all that Milah didn't even visit me. Not once. Didn't even write me a letter. Instead she took off. Moved to Texas to live with a cousin. Last I heard she'd married some old rich guy and was expecting a baby." His voice dripped with self-loathing. It made Emma's heart ache.

"When I got out I just wanted to get my GED," Killian said, "But Pete and Wendy pressured me to go back to school instead. I'd always gotten good grades and they wanted me to go to college. Thought finishing high school would help me get in somewhere good. They even said they'd help me pay for it. So I put up with a whole year of hearing people whisper about me. Always talking behind my back—calling me a thug and a criminal. I couldn't get out of there soon enough. But I never did make it to college." He laughed a hollow, mocking laugh. "See, Pete, Wendy and Rob were all I had left. And I was too fucking scared to leave them."

"Killian…" Emma tried to stop him. This had gone too far. She'd never wanted to upset him like this.

He shook his head. "While we're at it, let's put my last big dirty secret out on the table. You want to know the reason why my dad was never around? It's because he's in prison. Serving fifty to life. So I guess being a fucked up loser runs in the family." He turned away from her again and sank to the edge of his bed. He sat bent over with his face in his hands.

She took a few steps toward him, her heart racing nervously. She wanted to blame her dad for all this, but really, she was the one who'd doubted Killian. She was the one who'd pushed him into this.

"I'm sorry," she said again.

He didn't look up. "You can leave now if you want to. I understand."

Emma's heart pounded in her chest. One part of her brain whispered to her that her life would be so much simpler if she _did_ leave. If she walked away now, he'd never ask her to come back—she knew him well enough to know that. He would turn into nothing more than a short-lived summer fling, and she'd leave at the end of August and never see him again. Eventually this broken, complicated man would be nothing more than a distant memory.

So why did that thought bring tears to her eyes?

He deserved so much more than someone else who would leave him behind. She wouldn't be that person. Not today.

Emma had always been a girl who knew her own mind. She made decisions quickly. And today was no different. She stepped closer to him, until she stood right in front of where he sat. "No," she said.

"What?" he asked softly.

"No," she repeated. "I'm not leaving. Killian—look at me."

He raised his head slowly, and she wasn't surprised to see a glint of unshed tears in his eyes. He felt things so deeply—so passionately. And he already felt things for her, too. She could hear it in his voice—see it in his eyes—every time they were together.

"Killian," she said, holding his gaze. "I'm sorry for pushing you. I'm sorry for doubting you. And I’m not leaving." She shook her head. "I never should have let my dad's questions bother me. I don't care about your past. Not really."

"Why not?" Killian asked. 

She reached forward with both hands to caress his face and combed her fingers into his hair. "Because it doesn't matter who you were five years ago, or four years ago, or even three years ago. All that matters to me is who you are right now. That's the man I chose to be with. And nothing you've said has made me change my mind. I'm still here. I still choose you."

He looked at her with desperate longing in his eyes. She held her breath when he ran his fingers along her arm, and when he gently tugged on her hip she sat down on the bed beside him, her hands still cradling the sides of his face.

He leaned towards her until their faces were almost touching. "Emma…" he whispered.

She swallowed and nodded, her heart pounding out of her chest. He cupped her face in his hand and pulled her in for a deep, hungry kiss. His hands roved over her face—her back—her sides.

Fire surged through Emma's body. She grabbed at the back of his neck, pulling him closer, her other hand snaking up under his shirt to caress the skin of his back. She didn't mean to hurt him—she was going to make things right. She was going to show him how much he meant to her.

She gasped when he shifted suddenly. He half-stood and gripped under her hips with both hands. He lifted her and scooted her further back onto the bed, crawling up after her.

Emma drew in a shaky breath, the heat inside of her rising ever higher. She inched back a little further and then lay back, reaching up to pull him down over her, between her legs.

She matched his intensity when their mouths crashed together again. She'd never felt so much need—so much hunger.

His hand slid up under her tank top to cup her breast, and she gasped again, arching into his touch. Her whole body was on fire.

She thrust her hips up against him and closed her eyes as exquisite sensation flowed through her. He dipped his head to trail kisses down her neck, across her collar bone, and up onto her shoulder. Every spot he kissed burned in the best possible way. She continued to thrust against him, his body putting pressure in just the right spot, even through her jean shorts.

Delicious tension coiled and swelled inside of her as they continued to grind against each other. She wanted to touch him—to feel him—to melt into him. She was ready to explode.

And then stars burst across the insides of her eyelids and her whole body shuddered. She whimpered and moaned.

"Oh God, Emma. God—" Killian groaned, thrusting against her a few more times, eliciting more whimpers from her throat. At last he tensed and moaned, and then relaxed, slumping at her side.

Emma closed her eyes and breathed deep, lying still beside him, her arms still wrapped around him and his legs tangled with hers. She'd heard Ruby's stories about dry humping her boyfriends, but Emma had never done anything like this in her life. She felt relaxed and dizzy and nervous and happy all at the same time.

She felt Killian pushing her hair back from her face, and opened her eyes to smile at him.

He smiled back. "I'm sorry for getting so worked up about all that stuff," he said softly. "I went to therapy for about six months after getting out of juvie, but I probably should have gone longer. Clearly I still have trouble dealing with all this crap."

"It's okay," she said, cradling his face and caressing his cheek with her thumb. "Thank you for trusting me enough to share it with me."

He ran his fingertips lightly up and down her upper arm. "Hey, if we're gonna be serious about this thing you have the right to know the truth. I shouldn't have been such a jerk about it."

"And I shouldn't have badgered you into it. I'm sorry."

"It's okay. I get it. Really." He kissed her forehead, and she smiled again. 

This felt so good. So peaceful and so right. She was still sorry about pushing him, but she was glad they understood each better, now. Her heart swelled at the thought that she was probably one of the few people he'd ever shared this with. And he wanted their relationship to be serious.

Wow.

She snuggled against him. "I'm really glad I'm with you."

He let out a soft, short laugh. "I still have no idea why."

Emma shook her head and leaned back to meet his eyes. "Because I'm enough for you. Just me. Just Emma. I don’t have to be the rodeo champ or the valedictorian or the heir to the family business. I can just be Emma."

Killian smiled. "None of that stuff is who you are. It's just things you do, or expectations people have of you. That's not who you really are. And who you are is perfect, even without any of that other stuff."

A thrill ran down her spine. "That's why I'm with you. I can just be Emma, and you can just be Killian. That's enough."

His smile softened, and he wore a look of wonder in his eyes. "Yeah. It is."

 

TBC


	5. Chapter 5

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Sorry for the long break between updates. Life has been stressful and my muse has been absent. Anyway, I’m not predicting how many chapters this will be anymore because I don’t have time to write long chapters anymore if I want to update more often, so I’ll just manage 3-4 scenes when I find time, call ‘em a chapter, and put ‘em up. I’ll just keep on doing that until I’ve done the story justice. So hopefully chapters will come more frequently now (fingers crossed). Also, I think I’ve kept everything within a “T” rating because I just don’t feel like getting explicit with this story, but if anyone thinks I’ve crossed into “M,” let me know and I’ll fix the rating. I don’t want to offend. Thanks for sticking with my little modern spin on the Pirate/Princess romance. I hope you continue to enjoy.

Emma stood just inside her motel door and leaned into Killian’s kiss. Everything about being with him felt so wonderful and right. She didn’t care if they’d been dating for less than a month—she didn’t think she could wait much longer before taking things to the next level. She clasped the back of his head and pulled him even closed.

“A-hem,” said Ruby from inside the room, clearing her throat loudly. “Sorry, kids, but I think it’s time to call it a night.”

Emma pulled back from Killian slightly, though she wasn’t completely ready to let go of him, yet, and smiled sheepishly.

“Your chaperone might have a point,” he said, grinning.

“ _Reluctant_ chaperone!” Ruby called indignantly.

Emma looked over her shoulder at her friend and laughed. “I think we caught that part the first twenty times you said it.”

It was the 3rd of July, (well, technically the 4th, now that midnight had come and gone), and the only way Emma had gotten permission to come cheer on Killian at a derby nearly four hours from home was by agreeing to take Ruby along with her. “ _For safety’s sake_ ,” her parents had insisted, but they all knew chaperoning was the real reason. Ruby had finally agreed after Emma committed to working Ruby’s three breakfast shifts at the diner for her over the next week. It had been worth it to see Killian smash and bash his way to second place.

Ruby folded her arms and glared. “I don’t care if you’re sick of hearing it. I’ll keep on repeating it until you kick that boy out of here so we can get to sleep. We need to head out early tomorrow.”

That was another condition Emma’s parents had insisted on—she needed to be home by noon to help set up for their annual July 4th backyard barbeque. All the movers and shakers in town were always invited, and her mom always ran herself ragged making the place look perfect. 

Emma sighed. “You’re right. I know. Just give me two more minutes to finish saying goodnight, and then he’s gone. I promise.”

Ruby frowned. “Fine. Two minutes. But I’m timing you.”

Emma didn’t doubt that she was.

She turned back to Killian. “Are you sure you won’t come, tomorrow?”

Killian took a deep breath and rolled his eyes. “To the party with the sheriff and the mayor and the high school principal and probably at least twenty other people who’ll disapprove of me? Don’t think so.”

Emma thought he was overreacting. “It won’t be that bad,” she insisted.

“Yes, it will be,” Killian countered. “I’m sure Sheriff Humbert and Principal Mills would happily mutter dire warnings about my character into your parents’ ears every time our backs are turned. If I’m not there, at least there’s a chance they’ll forget you’re dating a former delinquent for the evening instead of giving your dad more reason to hate me.”

Now it was Emma’s turn to roll her eyes. “Or they’ll see that now that you’re reformed, you’ve turned into a responsible and promising young man.”

Killian squeezed his lips together, and shook his head. “Always the optimist, aren’t you?”

_And you’re always the pessimist_ , she thought. He was so quick to think the worst of himself—and to expect others to do the same. He hid that trait well beneath his flirtatious swagger, but since the day he’d opened up to her about his past, she’d begun to see his deep insecurities. But those wouldn’t be solved tonight. She needed to throw in the towel on this one. “Fine. But I’ll see you Saturday, right?”

His smile returned and he squeezed her hip with his hand. “You bet your life, you will. I’m gonna miss you all day tomorrow. I’ll be bereft without you.”

Emma giggled. “Sure you will.”

“I will,” he insisted, and leaned in for another kiss that sent fresh shivers down her spine.

He pulled back. “Okay.” His eyes darted playfully over to Ruby. “From the look on your reluctant chaperone’s face, I’d say our time is up.”

Emma sighed. What would it be like to lie in his arms all night? She wished she could find out. “Yeah,” she conceded. “Okay. Goodnight.”

“Goodnight,” he repeated, giving her one last, soft, sweet kiss before stepping away so she could close the door behind him.

Emma turned back to face Ruby, who once again glared at her. “You two are disgusting, y’know?”

A few minutes later, after they’d both settled into their beds, Ruby spoke up softly in the now-dark room. “Do you think you’re going to try keep things going with Killian when we leave for school? We’ll be almost three hours away. That won’t be easy.”

“I—“ Emma’s voice caught in her throat as a sudden lump rose. Just a few weeks ago she’d have said that this was only a summer fling. There was no way it’d last as a long-distance thing. But now… Now she wasn’t sure of anything anymore. “I don’t know.”

Ruby sighed.

Emma rolled over to face the dark shape of her friend. “Even if we do try to keep things going, I’ll still be your wing-woman. That was our plan, and I’m sticking to it.”

“Thanks,” replied Ruby, in a loud whisper. “I’m not ready to lose my best friend just because some hot guy came along.”

The lump in Emma’s throat grew. Everything was changing so fast, but she’d been BFFs with Ruby since they were little girls. There was no way she was going to let that change. “You won’t lose me. I promise. We’re in this together. Got it?”

“Got it,” Ruby whispered in answer.

They fell silent, and a few minutes later Emma heard Ruby’s breathing take on the slow, deep pace of sleep.

Ruby made a good point. Sooner or later she’d have to figure out exactly what she intended to do about this thing with Killian when the summer ended.

~ ~ ~

Emma survived her family barbeque with only one vague warning from Sheriff Humbert to, “be careful what sort of company you keep. We don’t want bad influences to lead you into any trouble.” She’d managed a smile and a nod before making a quick escape. The rest of the day passed without any trouble, and she managed to enjoy hanging out with her cousins and Ruby.

Still, she was more than glad to get together with Killian on Saturday, and greeted him with an enthusiastic kiss when he hopped out of his truck in front of her house. 

“Hey,” she said grasping the front of his shirt and grinning up at him. “I was thinking we could go out riding today, if you want?”

Killian smiled but scratched his ear nervously. “That sounds lovely, except for one thing.”

Emma raised her eyebrows. “What?”

Killian sighed and looked heavenward before answering. “I guess now is the time when I confess that I’ve never actually ridden a horse before.”

Emma managed to laugh and glare at the same time, and swatted him lightly on the shoulder. “You, Killian Jones, are a hypocrite. After all that teasing you gave me because I’d never been to a derby, and now I found you that mister _huge rodeo fan_ has no idea how to ride a horse.”

He spread his hands in defeat. “Guilty.”  
Emma shook her head and smiled. “Well, there’s only one thing to do. I’ll have to teach you.”

Her dad was at the dealership that afternoon, so Emma saddled up his mare, Tinkerbelle, for Killian. He cocked an eyebrow at the name. “Seriously? David Nolan rides a horse named Tinkerbelle?”

Emma laughed. “He made the mistake of letting my mom name her. And mom is a mega-fan of all things Disney. Mostly we call her Tink. Doesn’t sound quite so prissy.”

They led Leroy and Tink out to the training corral, and Emma helped Killian mount. It didn’t take long to have him guiding Tink around the corral at a gentle walk.

Emma grinned at him from where she sat on Leroy’s back. Leroy seemed decidedly peeved at their slow pace, but the big guy would just have to deal with it.

“You’re doing great,” she said. “How do like it?”

Killian patted Tink’s neck and smiled back. “It’s fun. This girl and I and getting to be good friends, aren’t we sweetheart.” He smirked. “I think I’m a natural. You’ll have trouble keeping up with me before long.”

Emma raised her eyebrows. “Is that so?”

His answering smile conveyed an undeniable challenge. “Absolutely.”

Her heart pounded in her chest. He wanted a challenge? She’d give him one. “Let’s see about that,” she said, and kicked Leroy into a run.

They sprinted around the perimeter of the corral, and then trotted in circles around Killian and Tink while Tink pranced and whinnied, eager to join the fun. Killian looked unsteady in the saddle and wore a look of nervous concentration on his face while he fumbled with the reins. After another sprint around the corral, Emma drew Leroy alongside Tink and reined him in.

She looked at Killian and laughed. “Still think I’ll have trouble keeping up with you?”

Killian rolled his eyes skyward and sighed before conceding, “Perhaps not.”

After their ride they put the horses away in the barn, and Emma showed Killian how to stow the tack and rub down the horses. He might not have been much of a rider, yet, but Tink had really taken a liking to him. She whinnied happily while he brushed her sides and mane. Maybe her father’s horse was a better judge of character than her father was.

They finished up by washing their hands in the sink at the end of the barn, and then Emma turned to lead Killian back out of the barn when he caught her by the hip. She spun to meet his eyes.

“Hey—thanks for the lesson. It was great. Really.” He grasped both of her hips and pulled her closer, a tender smile on his face that set her heart pounding.

“You’re welcome,” she said softly, and then wrapped her arms around him and tipped her head up to meet him when he leaned in for a kiss.

As had been the case so often, lately, the kiss heated up fast. Emma moaned in pleasure as Killian backed her up against the wall and ran his hands over body, caressing her breasts. She arched into him and gripped his ass. She smiled against his lips at his answering groan.

She inched her fingers up under the hem of his tee-shirt to feel the warmth of his back. Suddenly his hand dipped inside her waistband, his fingers sliding lower. She gasped, involuntarily thrusting toward his touch.

God damn, that felt good.

Without thinking she moved one of her hands to cup over the hard bulge in his jeans, even as she deepened their kiss.

A shrill whinny broke the air, and Emma pulled back with another gasp. She blinked at Leroy tossing his mane in the stall across from her.

Oh God. What was she doing? Anyone in her family could turn up. This was insane.

She yanked Killian’s hand out of her pants and sidled away from him, probably with a little more violence than she intended.

He looked at her with shocked eyes. “Emma? I—Sorry. I didn’t mean to—I—I thought you were enjoying it.”

Emma took a deep breath while smoothing her shirt and hair. “I was enjoying it,” she snapped. “But this isn’t exactly the best place for that sort of thing. What do think would happen if my dad walked in on me getting you off in the middle of our barn? He’d kill you!”

Killian hooked his thumbs through his belt loops, feigning relaxation. “What if I was the one getting _you_ off? Maybe he’d respect me for putting your needs first?”

Emma tried to glare at him, but she couldn’t stop the corners of her mouth from ticking up at his joke. “Yeah—I’d rather not test that.”

He nodded slowly, his teasing smirk on his face. “True. As sexy and dangerous as a scar from a shotgun blast might look, I think it’s for the best that I not get one.”

Emma rolled her eyes and folded her arms, but smiled a little bigger. “It might be a broken nose or a concussion instead. My dad’s not big on guns.”

His eyes got big and he ambled toward her. “Well, definitely not worth the risk, then. Don’t want to ruin my pretty face.”

Emma grinned and shook her head.

Killian’s expression softened into something sweeter and more sincere, and he reached out to take her hand. “So, uh… do you want to go somewhere more private, then?”

Emma could read the unspoken implication behind his question. He’d made his desires pretty obvious when they were kissing. She swallowed hard. So it was time to face this discussion. She hadn’t been expecting it, today.

His gaze captivated her, keeping the fire in her core burning steadily. But was she really ready for this? 

“I…” She paused, searching for an answer. Her body certainly knew what it wanted, but the nerves shooting through her right now might be a sign that her mind wasn’t quite prepared. “I know we’ve been together for a while, now,” she said slowly, hoping he’d be understanding, “but I’m still not sure if I’m ready to take things to the next level—physically—yet. Is that okay?”

“Hey,” he said, his brows knitting in concern, “of course it’s okay. I’m not gonna push you if you’re not ready. I don’t even care about having sex.”

Emma raised her eyebrows at that one. “The bulge in your pants begs to differ.”

Killian rolled his eyes and smiled. “Alright. So I care. But that’s not why I’m with you, Emma. I’m crazy about you. I just want to spend time with you—as much as I can. That’s what I really care about. The other stuff can wait.”

A thrill ran down Emma’s back, and her heart jumped in her chest. She’d always been led to believe that experienced guys would have expectations. But he really didn’t care? “Seriously? You’re okay waiting?”

He squeezed her hand and reached up to tuck her hair behind her ear, a soft, reassuring smile on his face. “Yes. I am absolutely fine. I want you to be happy. That’s all I really care about.”

Emma grinned, her heart racing. She felt elated and giddy. How did she ever get so lucky? “Okay.”

“Okay,” he echoed.

In spite of her assertions to the contrary, the heat in her core had only flared hotter. How had his telling her he didn’t need sex make her want it even more? What the hell? She swallowed hard, trying to force down her rising eagerness. She needed to stop listening to her body and go back to listening to the mind that knew it needed a little more time.

Maybe a little more discussion would be the way to pull back on her rising desire.

“I… I want to make a confession to you,” she said softly, nerves shooting all through her body.

He raised an eyebrow, his expression serious. “What?”

Emma took a deep breath, bracing herself for what she was about to say. “I’ve… never done it before. I mean—I’m still… a virgin.”

His eyes widened in surprise. “Oh.”

She felt heat rising in her face, and she looked away. “Yeah. I know. A lot of girls my age are already sexually active, but…”

“But a lot aren’t,” he said, his voice ringing with sympathy. “Hey—don’t be embarrassed, or anything. There’s nothing wrong with it. I should’ve thought…” He sighed. “I don’t usually think about the age different thing, y’know? It never seems like that big a deal. But I guess this is one of those times when it is. I should have known you’d be…”

“A prude?” Emma offered, grimacing.

“Inexperienced,” he said, giving her a pointed look. “And there’s nothing wrong with that. I kind of feel like a jerk now, for thinking you’d be ready. Of course you want to take your time. I’m sorry.”

“You don’t need to feel like a jerk. Really. You’re being totally amazing about this,” she said.

His answering smile was wry. “Yeah. Well—I guess I have a confession of my own to make. I, uh, I’ve never been with a virgin before.” He shrugged. “It just never worked out that way. I guess that’s why it didn’t even occur to me. Damn. I feel like such an asshole, now, for not even thinking you might be. You deserve so much better than a spur of the moment roll in the hay for your first time.”

Emma smiled. “Thanks. And for the record, you’re not an asshole. Most of the time.”

He huffed a laugh. “Gee. Thanks.”

She squeezed his hand. Affection surged through her at the sheepish look on his face. She was getting serious feelings for this man. What the hell was she going to do when she left for school? “Well, I guess when and if I decide I’m ready, it’ll be a first for both of us.”

“I guess so.” He held her gaze with a look that made her heart leap again.

She took a deep breath to break the spell. “So… want to go inside and play a little Mario Kart? I bet I can kick your ass.”

“We’ll see about that.” He wrapped his arm around her shoulders and they walked out of the barn and back toward the house.

She could hardly believe they’d just had that conversation. She’d never felt comfortable enough with any of her high school boyfriends to talk like that. But with Killian, she felt safe.

And as for being ready for sex—she was pretty confident it was a “when,” not an “if.” And that “when” would probably be pretty soon.

~ ~ ~

The next week was a tiring one. Emma worked the three breakfast shifts that she owed to Ruby, and also kicked her rodeo training back into high gear. She’d been taking it easy for the three weeks since the Outlaw Rodeo, but it was time to get back to business. Though she was only competing in one more pro-rodeo that summer, the college rodeo circuit would start up in September, and she had to be ready. If she wanted a shot at an all-around women’s title in her division, she had to brush up on her goat tying and breakaway roping skills as well as her barrel riding.

Even with all that, she managed to see Killian for at least a little while every night after he got off work. They went dancing again on Tuesday, but the rest of the week they kept things simple and hung out at his place, watching television or playing video games with Rob and Billy. 

Emma and Killian always ended up back in his room for a little making out before the end of each night, but now Killian pointedly avoided touching her anywhere between her mid-thigh and her waist. It tickled Emma that he was so determined to respect her and be a gentleman, but it also left her wanting more—a lot more.

After her last breakfast shift, on Friday morning, she put on some dark glasses and went into a drug store two blocks down from Granny’s Diner. With a slight twinge of embarrassment she found the shelf she was looking for. Why in the hell were there so many different kinds of condoms? She studied the shelf for a few minutes, trying to figure out which ones to buy. When she noticed an older man heading her direction, she quickly grabbed one of the likely candidates off the shelf and headed away from the shelf in question as quickly as possible. She avoided making eye contact with the clerk as she checked out, silently hoping that no one in the store had recognized her.

When she got back in her car she opened the box and shoved a few of the foil wrapped condoms into her purse before tucking the rest in her glove box. There. Now she was ready. She was still on the pill, but better to be safe than sorry. Now when she felt the time was right, she could act. No need to hesitate or second guess. She could just go for it.

The thought filled her with giddy elation. For the first time in years she was doing something just for herself. Not because she needed a scholarship or wanted to live up to her parents’ expectations, or to maintain her reputation. She was doing it because she wanted to. She was doing it because she’d never even come close to feeling for anyone else the way she felt about Killian. He was _hers_ , and she wanted him in every way she could have him.

She took a few deep breaths to steady herself before driving home. Her decision was made. This was happening. Soon.


End file.
